Temerity Jane
31. 12. 2014

1. What did you do in 2014 that you’ve never done before?

We PCS’d to another base. Phil’s done it before, obviously, but it was my first time. I’ve moved a lot of times, but always by choice and always to places I wanted to be. This move was entirely different in every single way. Also, I went to New Mexico for the first time. And then I stayed there. I remain here to this very moment.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

Looking back, I didn’t make any for 2014 because, as I said in this post last year, I knew 2014 was going to be a shitshow. When I made the post in December of last year, I already knew we were moving to New Mexico. I didn’t tell the Internet because, I don’t know, I don’t tell you guys everything, but I did already know. And I’m glad I didn’t make any resolutions for 2014 because it was a really hard year. A really, really hard year. We got through and that feels like enough.

I don’t plan on making any specific resolutions for 2015. Just the normal new year, clean slate type of stuff. I’ll attempt to be better in nearly every aspect of my life, fail at most or all of them, and then not feel even a little bit bad about it when this question comes around again next year.

You know what, I’ll blog more. How about that.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

I want to refer you to last year’s answer.

People I know gave birth, but no one close enough for me to visit them in the hospital. That’s going to be my new definition of “close” for these surveys going forward. Would I have visited in the hospital? That is someone close to me. None of those people gave birth in 2013. You should also know I would only visit someone in the hospital after she gave birth if explicitly invited. Just so you know. If you give birth and you’re expecting me to just show up because we’re close and you didn’t call me beforehand and say, hey, once the baby arrives, come on over, I won’t show up. Actually, not to put too much on you after you’ve just given birth, but you should probably let me know after, as well. Because maybe you told me beforehand, but then you had the baby, and I decide to stay home anyway because you never know beforehand how you’re going to feel after and I just think, better safe than sorry, and look, your baby isn’t bread and he isn’t going to go moldy, he’s going to be just as fresh when I come and see him later, you know? It’s nothing against you, it’s for you. It’s that I have a hard time imagining why you’d really want me there, probably the same way some people have a hard time imagining why other women might want no one around, you know? So maybe just have your husband send a confirmation text. Actually, I’m going to send a card or something, okay? I’m just not coming. I’m not. The answer to this question is just going to be perpetually no, because I’m never going to see anyone’s fresh baby in the hospital, thus by my own definition, no one close to me will ever give birth. So. That’s… a no.

I’m sticking with that answer, and also sticking with my resolve to not visit you in the hospital if you have a baby. I still feel really good about this answer. One, no one who I would visit in the hospital had a baby and two, I will never visit a new mother in the hospital. I’ve been there. If I was ever there again, I wouldn’t want to see any of you. No offense. Or offense, whatever, I’m not the boss of your feelings and that’s fine.

4. Did anyone close to you die.


5. What other countries did you visit?

Stealing last year’s answer, which was stolen from 2012, which was stolen from 2011.

Stealing last year’s answer, which I stole from the year before, as I intend to do for the foreseeable future. And by foreseeable future, I basically mean forever. And look, I don’t feel guilty about it. I’m done feeling guilty or ashamed about the fact that I don’t care to travel. I don’t. Not everyone does. There’s nothing wrong with a person who has no desire to travel. There isn’t.

None. You can also retroactively write that down as my year end wrap up answer for every year since 1981, though it isn’t really fair to count 1981, since I was born in December of that year and didn’t even have my birth certificate issued until early 1982, let alone a passport.

Additionally, I don’t want to travel at all and I don’t feel bad about it. 2014 was a year of not feeling bad about stuff.

6. What would you like to have in 2015 that you lacked in 2014?

Control over more aspects of life.

7. What dates from 2014 will remain etched in your memory?

The day we all found out how sick Hugo was. It’s also a day that we coincidentally got some incredibly good news for our family, news that lifted an enormous burden that had followed us for a long while. I had more feelings that day than I’ve had in my life total. 

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

I was sick almost the entire year. For the majority of the year, I spent 4 out of every 7 days in bed. Things have turned a corner fairly recently, but for most of the year, the fact that everyone stayed alive and fed was pretty major. PJs was a pretty big achievement, as usual, but it doesn’t feel that big because I’m not big on effort. I also got Penelope involved in way more things than I have before, which feels like an achievement because I truly hate being involved in things, yet I press on.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Well, I spent almost the entirety of 2014 in bed, so.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Ah, yes. On a grand scale.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

I really love the Vice 3 palette. I also expanded my makeup brush collection, and listen, you are never going to regret upgrading your brushes. You’re just not. I promise.

We bought a new car, which was amazing, because the one we had was paid off and mostly mechanically sound, but slowly driving us insane. Only the front windows worked. Only the passenger door would open from the outside. Most of the door handles were broken on the inside. Little by little it was falling apart around us and while it wasn’t great timing and it really chapped my ass to take on a car payment, it was a good choice. It’s amazing, too, because we were driving a 2004 model car and bought a 2014, so it was like leaping 10 years into the future. BLUETOOTH! RANGE ESTIMATORS! INTACT DOOR HANDLES.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

The Internet (parts of it) has really stepped up for a lot of people this year, and that was great.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

You know what, I’m going to stick with the Internet for my answer for this one, too.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Oh, you guys, my dogs. Brinkley broke his leg last Christmas day. Then he got an aural hematoma that required surgery. Then he got a lump in his eye that required surgery. Then, when he went to get the stitches out of his eye, we found out that the cough he’d had was actually Valley Fever. Shortly after he started medicine for that and just a day or so before we left Arizona, he developed an enormous abscess in his leg, likely from the Valley Fever, that took us literally months to heal. We thought he’d lose his leg, it was so devastating and terrible. Come the fall, he was finally about 95% healed, but the abscess and resulting lameness had taken away ALL the muscle mass in his back legs and his arthritis had gotten terrible, so he went for several different types of injections to help move him along more comfortable. And then? Sheldon got bitten by a brown recluse. That. Was. HORRIFYING. That happened at the end of October and he remains in a cone today. That’s where all our money went. ALL of it. Multiply whatever you’re thinking by 2. Or 4. Or 5. Thousands. Multiple thousands. We’d spend every penny of it again, of course, but for our sake and theirs, I sure hope we don’t have to.

15. What did you get really, really excited about?

Korean television. PJs. A Korean television star on the cake at PJs.

16. What song will always remind you of 2014?

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

a) happier or sadder? I’m super neutral right now.
b) thinner or fatter? I think about the same, though I was notably thinner sometime in between.
c) richer or poorer? Poorer. For sure.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Keeping up here. A lot went on in the last year and I really let it slide past because I was probably always asleep. I slept a lot this year.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Same as last year: yelling at Penny, procrastinating work, laying in bed.

20. How did you spend Christmas?

At home, just the three of us, just like we wanted. We spaced out the preparation this year after last year’s flu bit us in the ass and left us crying in the middle of the night trying to set up Santa stuff. We didn’t get sick this year, and almost every single thing was done ahead of time. In bed by 10pm. Perfect. Penny was incredibly spoiled by generous friends and family.


2013’s answer: this is a stupid question. I’ll delete it next year.

22. What was your favorite TV show?

It’s Okay, That’s Love was OUTSTANDING. It was so good. My Love From Another Star ended this year, too, and it was also just great. There’s a REASON I keep pushing people toward Korean television, and both of those shows were total standouts. I’ve really liked others, too, but if you’re going to watch some – and you SHOULD – try one of those. DM me on Twitter and I’ll send you my phone number and I will support you via text all the way through. You won’t regret it. Well, you won’t regret watching. You might regret giving me your phone number.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate at this time last year?

I don’t think so. Maybe a hate the same people with a more matured hate.

24. What was the best book you read?

I really did not read much in 2014. It’s a shame, really, because every time I pick up a book I realize how much I missed reading this year. But it just wasn’t possible most of the time. What should I read next year? Let me know. I like everything except stuff that’s terrible.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Kpop continues to delight me to no end. I really got into 2NE1 a lot this year, and Taeyang, along with Big Bang, Girl’s Generation, and a lot of other stuff, let’s be honest, you don’t care.

26. What did you want and get by year’s end?

I feel a lot better. It’s not perfect and it’s not great, but there were a lot of times this year when I was pretty sure I would never feel good again and my whole life was ruined, not in the teenage dramatics kind of way, but literally ruined. I just feel a lot better.

27. What did you want and not get by year’s end?

I want to go back to Phoenix really badly. That’s not going to happen any time soon, but that’s not going to stop me from wanting it. If anything, this move has really solidified for both of us how much we liked the Phoenix area and how certain we are that it will be our final destination after Phil retires from the Air Force.

28. What was your favorite film of the year?

It’s time to come clean. I don’t like movies.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

We sent Penelope to a sitter on base the night before my birthday and decided to go out for dinner. After driving around and trying to decide, we had Wendy’s because that’s what I like. Thinking back, we had Wendy’s for my birthday last year. I don’t even care. Bacon me. Then on my actual birthday, I was sick, just like last year. I am now 33.

30. What do you think would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Actually participating in it.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2014?

I have never in my life had any kind of concept for any aspect of my being, but I will tell you what, I am late to the game but have now fully jumped on the long shirts/leggings combo and 2015 is going to be the year of no zippers. I am not stuffing my c-section pouch into another pair of jeans if I can help it. Nope. Done. Forget it. Elastic exists and we should make use of it.

32. What kept you sane?

I don’t know if any particular thing is responsible for my sanity, but I can tell you that every week, I look forward to watching Running Man, and it makes my week every single time. Nothing makes me laugh like Running Man, and it just really puts me in a good mood.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Kim Jong Kook. He can show me his fancy any time.


2013 answer: I’ll also delete this one next year.

35. Who did you miss?

Phoenix. And I miss everyone from the shows I watch after they’re over. That’s a thing, you know it is. Except maybe it happens to you with books. That’s only because you’re not on the kdrama train yet. Get on board. Text me.

36. Who was the best new person you met?

I don’t.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2014.

I don’t feel bad about stuff.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up the year.



9 responses to “Don’t call it a comeback.”

  1. Swistle says:

    One problem with movies is they are too short. That’s why I like series: they’re like 20-hour movies.

    I like Wendy’s too. I get lunch there every year on my birthday. I mean, a lot of other times too. But in this context, where we are talking about Wendy’s as it relates to birthdays, I’m specifying that particular annual meal.

    TJ Reply:

    Kdramas are the best because they’re TV shows, but like a movie they have a sort of single overarching plot that’s neatly or at least mostly resolved at the end of 16-22 episodes. So satisfying. I will keep pushing kdramas in case it hasn’t stuck yet.

  2. Clay says:

    Re: question 29

    I turned 33 this year as well. Best thing about it, by far, has been adding,”just like Jesus” whenever someone someone asks my age.

  3. LizScott says:

    1. I’m really glad you are feeling better
    2. I dislike film relative to how much I like TV. TV forever
    3. I kind of very badly want to have another kid just to orchestrate a scenario in which you have no option but to see me and the baby in the hospital. I really love a good i told you so
    4. Just tell me what eye brushes to buy. Just tell me.
    5. I’m sorry about all the puns, but not sorry enough to stop
    6. I’m really, really glad you’re feeling better.

  4. I love your Korean television enthusiasm. It rivals my own for British television, and since my favorite source for keeping up with that particular flavor of entertainment was just booted off the internet I am probably going to need a new television obsession to keep myself busy until my other shows are officially available stateside. (Thanks a lot, internet, I can’t believe I’m going to have to *wait* for series 2 of Broadchurch now!)

  5. Claire says:

    I also do not care to travel and do not like movies. I appreciate that you are not ashamed of these things. When it comes up in conversation that I don’t like to travel, I think of your previous post on this subject and feel somewhat less bad about myself.

  6. Linnea says:

    I DO want to hear your kpop list. I feel like I should bring you a jump drive to PJs & let you fill it up with stuff. Because these songs are so very stuck in my head.

  7. Sky says:

    I’m not one for resolutions, or mantras, or inspirational quotes… but, I’ve been trying to come up with “something” for 2015. A tagline? I’m not sure; no matter, you have nailed my 2015 outlook in one simple line: “I’m not the boss of your feelings and that’s fine.” I’ll be quoting you all year – thank you!

    More importantly, I’m very happy you are starting to feel better and I hope that trend continues for 2015!

  8. Monika Spykerman says:

    I really liked this post. Mostly because I had a shitty year too so I sympathize, even though my shit was not the same as your shit, but still, shit is shit and I can sympathize with feeling shitty.

    Here’s to a more non-shitty 2015!