Temerity Jane

Kate

As you know, Internet, Phil and I are pretty involved with packing and moving at the moment, so I’m kind of copping out on the blogging a little bit for the next couple of days. We plan to be set up in the new house with internet by Sunday, so until then, I am just going to piggyback on crap that other people have said. Today, that other people would be my sister.

Right around the time I got engaged, I found out that my sister had been reading this site, in secret, for almost a year. While she was not thrilled to finally be found out, she did enjoy the fact that the pressure of keeping her secret was off, so that not only could she now talk to me about what she read, but she could also comment here as well.

So, she’s been commenting here and there for a while now, under the deep cover code name of “sister.” While I think all of my commenters are interesting and intelligent and hilarious, I did want to draw your attention today specifically to her contributions over the last eight or so months.

I know not everyone has time to read, comment, then come back and read other comments, but I feel you would be doing yourself a favor to keep an eye out for comments placed under the name “sister.”

In defense of herself, on being discovered, and the potential butt-bow-bridesmaid-dress punishment:

whatev, INTERNET. why don’t YOU ALL wear a big stupid bow on YOUR non-existant asses.
if she was your sister, you’d want to read it too. she’s not EVEN your sister and you all read it. now how fair is that?

also i made her pee her pants laughing when she was twelve by pretending to shake a dice through my head. PEED. HER. PANTS.
i’m here to stay, bitches! and there will be no giant bow.

On Phil’s generous gift of Latina Magazine and our shared genetic shortcomings:

maybe phil knows that Latina has articles about how to grow a classic Latina booty. and he’s hinting.

ps- if this is the case, forward them on over.

Her own contributions to the WINCEABLE! grammar post:

HA! Walla. People are dumb. You would LOVE, and by love I mean despise, the people I work with. One lady used the phrase “he engulged himself on that pizza” and she didn’t even BLINK. She was also not aware of the fact that cats and dogs have lungs though, so maybe bad example.

I’m… ah… not actually sure what this had to do with anything, but here you go:

So you know in Old School where Jeremy Piven’s the dean and they’re all like “Oh yeah, Cheee-eeeese.” Chuck sleep farted last night to the tune of “cheeee-eeese” and I almost peed. But it doesn’t beat the time he wake farted and it sounded EXACTLY like Peter Griffin’s laugh. Then we both almost peed.

Totally getting where I’m coming from about Marc Summers:

my TV boyfriend is chuck woolery cause one time i had a dream that i made out with him.
could be worse.

Reacting to Brinkley’s acting talent:

OH MY GOD IT TOOK EVERYTHING IN ME NOT TO PEE

Acknowledging the great divide between us:

you know if there wasn’t undeniable proof that we are sisters i would SWEAR it couldn’t be true.
AGAINST the legalization of marijuana in arizona for recreational use?
BUTTHEAD.

Rectifying the forgotten Smidgens/lost hair flower situations:

DON’T BE MAD! I FORGOT THE SMIDGENS! sorry. i will send them out… tomorrow? monday at the LATEST. most likely tomorrow. text me your address again. i never actually write it down anywhere unless i am at the post office mailing you something and then i call and say GIVE ME YOUR ADDRESS I AM AT THE POST OFFICE TRYING TO MAIL YOU SOMETHING. i will also try to get to outrageous for a new cute flower clip (CAN’T BELIEVE YOU LOST IT) before the post office closes so i can send that too. and maybe a picture on my butt because we both know you are missing it hardcore by now.
also chuck’s mom is getting married in VEGAS and that might alter my plans to come see youse guys. i’m not sure yet. ANYWAY. (_|_) YOU’VE BEEN MOONED VIA YER BLOG.

Finding a loophole in the “no prison pen pals” rule:

so you’re telling me that if i got locked up overseas phil wouldn’t let us correspond?? way to be a brother-in-law, phil.

Now, when Kate finds out that I’ve dedicated an entire post to her, she is going to be thrilled to death, because the only person that finds Kate funnier than I find Kate is Kate herself. If you look back over the category dedicated to me and my two siblings, you can see more examples, as well.

In the interests of both my need for content and Kate’s need to talk about all things Kate, please leave any questions or topics you may like to see Kate discuss in the comments, as you will make her day and potential future days as well as shift the burden of interaction onto someone who isn’t me.

Possible topics to discuss with Kate:

- Her butt and her own fascination with it
- Her one eyed albino gecko named Burt Reynolds
- Growing up in the shadow of such epic awesomeness