It’s very late, I’m still awake, and I didn’t link to anyone.
January 28th, 2010 | by TJ |From Twitter:
I don’t know if what I’m about to say crosses some unspoken boundary Phil might have about what I’m allowed to put on the Internet.
HOWEVER, I’m not in bed because just coming up the STAIRS I was hit in the face with a wall of his butt-smell so thick the air is hazy.
Maybe as a man, that’s something he’ll be proud of when he wakes up. As a woman, I’m afraid laying too close to him might clog my pores.
LINK TO SOMEONE ELSE THURSDAY EVEN THOUGH YOU’RE PROBABLY READING THIS ON FRIDAY
So last week? I was really busy on Thursday, so I told myself I would just invent something called LINK TO SOMEONE ELSE THURSDAY and even though I probably wouldn’t do it every week, it would at least be convenient to have such a tradition established just in case laziness/busy-ness ever again fell on a Thursday. And? Thinking in an even more creative fashion? Since it’s my blog, if I didn’t have anything to write on a Tuesday, I could call that Tuesday LINK TO SOMEONE ELSE THURSDAY and it would be fine, because it’s my blog.
But you know what? Today is Thursday (EVEN THOUGH YOU’RE PROBABLY READING THIS ON FRIDAY) and I didn’t even manage the relatively small task of linking to someone else. I mean, talk about setting the bar low and then failing to meet even your own expectations, and do you know how most people have expectations for you, but your own expectations for yourself are actually way higher? I’m totally the opposite of that. I expect way less from me than other people do. That’s why you’re always so disappointed in me, but I remain relatively happy and carefree.
Honestly, you could learn something from me, Internet. It may sound like I’m trying to teach a course in Setting Ridiculously Small Goals and Not Even Bothering to Pretend to Achieve Them, and at first glance, that doesn’t sound like much. But if you really think it about it, Internet, aren’t I just teaching you that it’s okay to be you?
Temerity Jane – come for the humor and fart talk, stay for the moral at the end. I’m basically the Aesop of the Internet.
Anyway, Internet, the point is that early in the day, I made the mistake of listening to “Who Wants to Live Forever,” and if you didn’t know, that will basically shut down your entire day.
I was way too busy being morose and watching early episodes of Full House thinking about how sad it is the John Stamos doesn’t even realize that his mullet which seems so hip and happenin’ and bad boy stylin’ in the early 90s was going to be so mockworthy before he was even dead. And that little Stephanie Tanner has no idea she’s going to grow up to be a meth head.
WHO WANTS TO LIVE FOREVER INDEED, MR. MERCURY.
By Awlbiste on Jan 28, 2010
Farts and Queen: why I read TJ.
[Reply]
TJ Reply:
January 28th, 2010 at 11:35 pm
If you add in a near-crippling and delusional sense of superiority, you’ve pretty much got me summed up right there.
[Reply]
By Lara on Jan 28, 2010
That song reminds me if Highlander which reminds me of Clancy Brown which reminds me of your (future) Great Dane.
So – are you allowed pets in your new house?
[Reply]
TJ Reply:
January 28th, 2010 at 11:36 pm
Brinkley’s best friend is a Great Dane named Augusta and I got some video of them tonight and it makes Brinkley look so tiny.
Re: pets in the new place. I have a dog and I’m aware of who his best friend is. Wait, one step back – I have ascribed such personality and feelings to our dog that I believe he actually HAS a best friend. Would I really live anywhere without him? After all, I’m his second best friend.
[Reply]
Lara Reply:
January 28th, 2010 at 11:56 pm
Aw, Dex and Andrew are best friends too. Can’t imagine one without the other. We’re thinking of moving too but our options ate limited, but it’s not like not bringing him is an option. Glad Brinkley is going with you guys, and maybe you’ll have a Clancy soon. They are freakin huge – Dexter is easily 100lbs and Great Danes make him look tiny.
[Reply]
By Kelektra on Jan 29, 2010
You know, as sad as this is, I’m gonna say it anyways; that’s the first time I’ve heard that version of that song. I like it. A lot. The version I’m more used to is Sarah Brightman’s – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1rfA9nMhqY&feature=youtube_gdata
[Reply]
Kelektra Reply:
January 29th, 2010 at 12:17 am
P.S. Could have found a better version, but iPhone iTunes searches make me wanna scream a little, so this was the best one I could find.
[Reply]
BlueTiger Reply:
January 29th, 2010 at 7:22 am
This is where I realise that yes, I just might be a bit old anyway, when you realise that there are people out there that don’t know the version of songs that I know.
Good thing I got an older boyfriend that looks funny at me when I claim complete ignorance about songs from Black Sabbath :P
[Reply]
Kelektra Reply:
January 29th, 2010 at 9:02 am
See, thing is, I’m almost 28; so you’d think by now I might have heard it at least once. My parents and their rampant love of country music when I was younger are to blame, I’m sure
[Reply]
By Swistle on Jan 29, 2010
First: “That’s why you’re always so disappointed in me, but I remain relatively happy and carefree.” Is hilarious.
Second: I know what you mean about that song.
[Reply]
By Chaninn on Jan 29, 2010
It’s so good to hear of someone else who accepts that they don’t always achieve their goals and yet are still cheerful and happy. Yay to you!
I’ve always wanted a great dane, but my house is tiny so when we got a dog we got a Corgi. Harry’s little but he believes with all his might that he’s a rottweiler. =)
Oh, and cat farts are far worse than guy farts, IMO.
[Reply]
Kelektra Reply:
January 29th, 2010 at 9:00 am
Re: cat farts – OMG yes. My cat can clear a room. The dog just scares himself out of sleep when he farts.
[Reply]
Adlib Reply:
January 29th, 2010 at 9:31 am
Add me too to the cat list. We have a new cat who is particular gassy, and omg, it’s the worst smell ever. I actually prefer my gassy husband’s smell.
I love Corgis! Do you have a Welsh Corgi or a Cardigan Welsh Corgi? Both are cute! I have a friend who has a Dachshund and his best friend is a Corgi.
[Reply]
Chaninn Reply:
January 29th, 2010 at 9:34 am
I have a Pembroke Welsh Corgi. He’s a tri-colored tank, lol. He looks like a very short, round german shepherd with the tan face and black back. His best friend is a Bernese Mountain Dog named Ozzy. So when they play it’s “Ozzy & Harry, you stop now!”
[Reply]
By Delicia on Jan 29, 2010
My husband has that Queen song on his playlist and every time it comes up I make him change it because it’s just SO SAD! It brings me back to Highlander, and that song is about Connor’s wife and *sniff sniff* ~downer~.
[Reply]