How do you like YOUR french toast?
June 8th, 2009 | by TJ |Internet,
Three awesome things for you today.
So, I live in Arizona, where the United States comes to volunteer where barely needed and then die, either of old age of by driving their damn golf carts on the road.
Oh, wait.
I’m sorry.
Golf CARS.
Anyway, what do old people like? They like senior specials at Denny’s. They like taking all of the early salon appointments. And they like home shopping networks.
Seriously, Internet, I have never seen so many home shopping channels all at once, ever. THERE IS A KNIFE CHANNEL.
The best ones, though, are the jewelry ones. The live auctions hold my attention for about a minute, but there’s another one that I watch before bed every. single. night.
What it is is this over excited obnoxious woman (there’s several, but they’re all the same, really), showing off different pieces of jewelry like you would on QVC or something. She talks about it a bit, how it’s just about the best thing ever ever and oh my god if you miss it, you’ll be so sorry. Then, the screen changes and these words flash across the screen:
“LET’S PLAY THE GAME!”
So, then the price comes up and a quantity, and the lady keeps talking about it and talking about it, harassing you to call in. AND? As she’s talking? The price DROPS. And you call in and I guess you press a button or something to say you want one, and the whole time, the price drops and drops until all of them are gone and then EVERYONE gets the LOWEST PRICE!
I, of course, have never called. My enjoyment comes solely from elbowing Phil just as he as falling asleep.
TJ: LOOK! Look at that ring!
Phil: Ugh… what about it?
TJ: It’s an 11 carat glacier topaz!
Phil: It’s a what?
TJ: OH LOOK! The price just dropped a hundred dollars! Give me your credit card!
Phil: No! Go to sleep!
TJ: THEY’VE ONLY GOT 3 LEFT! I’M PANICKING! I’M PANICKING! GLACIER TOPAZ!
Phil: Do you even know what a glacier topaz IS?
TJ: You can only get it from a specific spot in Russia! THERE’S ONLY TWO LEFT!
Phil: Uh huh…
TJ: You can only get it a few months a year because of the storms! ONE LEFT! PRICE CRASH! AAAAHHH!
Phil: *mumble*
TJ: Aw, they’re gone– HEY LOOK AT THAT NECKLACE!
Phil: *snore*
Second, it has been way too long since I have done this for you:
If you’re in London, it would be extra silly of you to miss out on seeing Julia Nunes. You know it would.
(if you can’t see the video, well, there is one there. So, you know. Curse your feed reader.)
And the last, super special, extra awesome thing is after the jump.
FOOLED YOU.
IT’S THIS!
(Again, a video. Sorry if your feed reader hates you.)
Got you again, Internet. Got you again.
Or, if you’re a newer reader, got you for the first time.
But rest assured, I’ll get you again.
Your pal,
TJ
PS – addendum
TJ: What? I LIKE this song.
Phil: I know.
TJ: Well you LOOKED at me.
Phil: I LIKE looking at you.
TJ: *scowl*
*silence*
TJ: Well, how do you like YOUR french toast?
PPS – “How do you like YOUR french toast?” is the new “So’s your face” in this house.
By Kelly on Jun 8, 2009
Old people in Arizona also love to eat at Coco’s.
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By Demi on Jun 8, 2009
You must have not seen the shopping channel show for “toys” yet… it’s awesome
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By john the diver on Jun 8, 2009
I hate to admit I like that second video. Also forwarding the Julia Nunes info to my buddy that just moved to London.
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By Nite on Jun 8, 2009
What is Coco’s in Arizona? In Japan it is the best curry chain around, but somehow I doubt it made the leap to the US.
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By lenebean on Jun 9, 2009
Yes, old people *do* love to eat at Coco’s! My old people sure did. Coco’s is basically like Denny’s but maybe a little better, like maybe Village Inn or Perkins.
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By Catastrophe on Jun 9, 2009
lenebean that was pretty useless to anyone who doesn’t know what Denny’s is. (Anyone outside the US).
“Whats a diddlytot?”
“Ah, its kinda like a fwibble but less cool”
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By Steve on Jun 9, 2009
I suffered from food-glee (like nerd-glee, but culinary related) when Kelly mentioned Coco’s in Arizona. Nite furthered my stomach’s cause by getting more in-depth, and then Lenebean crushed my dreams like so many cigarette butt’s beneath my ex-girlfriend’s high heels.
I have issues…
~Steve
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By Steve on Jun 9, 2009
Also, thanks for turning me on to Julia Nunez, TJ! (That sounded dirty, especially at this late hour.) Her voice is unique and fantastic! I wish I could be in London for the concert!
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By lenebean on Jun 9, 2009
Wow, catastrophe, way to be a douche. Coco’s restaurants are specific to Arizona, Colorado and southern/central California. Whereas Denny’s is located pretty much all over the country. But wait, there’s more: they are also located in Puerto Rico, Canada, Curaçao, Costa Rica, El Salvador, Jamaica, ***Japan***, Mexico, and New Zealand. Suck it.
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By Asara on Jun 9, 2009
LOL TJ. :) I’m glad you’ve settled in well enough to Arizona to have found awesome things to write about. I’m glad also that my QVC channel thingies do not have this Price Drop thing, or I would totally be even more broke than I am now, which is saying something. :)
Props to Julia Nunes! Her video for “Build Me Up, Buttercup” is one of the best remedies for a gloomy day I have ever seen, and I have you to thank for sharing her awesomeness.
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By Nej on Jun 9, 2009
I’ve spent the last hour or so checking out Julia Nunes videos. I’m hooked!!!! :-)
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By Catastrophe on Jun 10, 2009
@lenebean
A douche? Not only was the comment I made in satire it was also a reasonable point I was making. Why so aggressive?
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By Catastrophe on Jun 10, 2009
@lenebean
I find it amusing that in your effort to aggressively prove a point that Denny’s isnt just an “American thing” (I think thats what you were trying to say?) you named several SOUTH AMERICAN countries, Canada which is connected to America, Japan and New Zealand. Which kinda backed up what I was saying that your comment was geographically relevant.
I still don’t understand why you were so aggressive to my obvious satirical comment thought?
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By lenebean on Jun 10, 2009
You know what Catastrophe, you’re right. The US is not the only place in America, which is why I personally avoid using the term “American” to apply to stuff pertaining to the US. In the traveling I have done in the Americas, people I have spoken to find it offensive to use the term “American” in that manner, a perspective I also share. I’m confused about why you would say Japan and New Zealand are connected to Canada, but I’ll take your word for it.
You specifically said in your initial comment that people outside the *US* wouldn’t understand what Denny’s is, which my rebuttal clearly demonstrated to be incorrect. If you would like to continue believing that people outside of the US do not know what Denny’s is like, that is up to you.
As far as sounding aggressive, maybe it’s because your comment sounded douchey. In no way did your comment resemble what I understand to be satire, and I’m typically pretty adept at picking that up, regardless of the medium. You might consider working on your delivery.
The reason that I even pointed to Denny’s was because I trusted that Nite was intelligent enough to google Denny’s and other better-known national chains if s/he knew the names of some other ones. Given that Coco’s is regional, and that there are very distinct restaurants in the US, and globally as it turns out, that share the same name—including a Taiwanese one in my area—I believed that would prove more difficult.
It is challenging to describe the nature of Coco’s, Denny’s and other such restaurants because they’re really an odd creation, as the menus include very traditional items like burgers with fries, as well as some other fare that have an Italian, Mexican or Chinese influence. But to be more accurate, that description better applies to Perkins and Village Inn, while Denny’s fashions itself as a diner. I believed the menus for the aforementioned restaurants, widely available online, would speak for themselves.
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By lenebean on Jun 10, 2009
Also, if you would like to get technical, Mexico is part of North America; Puerto Rico, Curaçao and Jamaica are in the Caribbean; Costa Rica and El Salvador are in Central America. Curaçao and Puerto Rico are both territories, whereas the others are countries.
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By Catastrophe on Jun 11, 2009
I didn’t mean NZ and Japan were connected to Japan, I was just half asleep while typing the comment.
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By Catastrophe on Jun 11, 2009
Ohmygod. Canada… not Japan… I really need to stop typing comments as soon as I get into work ¬_¬
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By Catastrophe on Jun 11, 2009
Oh right, so it doesn’t matter if anything is geographically limited because you have google so its cool. Nice logic there. I’ll just speak in a Non-English language and expect you to go and google it yeah? You’re just being silly now.
My original comment: Oh yes I was deadly serious about a diddlytot.
What I was merely pointing out in a satirish manner was that simply saying “Coco’s is like Denny’s only better” relied thoroughly on people reading the comment knowing what Denny’s is. After all I could of just googled Coco’s and wouldn’t of even needed that explanation! Its all in the desire for conversation (it is a blog afterall).
-disclaimer- any typo’s/spelling mistakes/grammatical errors are due to tiredness and not stupidity, honest.
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By Willow on Jun 11, 2009
LMAO! I, too watch the jewelry channel before bed, and I thought I was the only one! Once, we had our satellite service terminated but guess what they didn’t take away? That’s right! The friendly (or scary) faces at Gems TV! Let’s Play the Game! We gave all the hosts funny nicknames, because seriously, who looks like that?
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By lenebean on Jun 11, 2009
Yes, I completely trust that someone who is reading an English language blog and writing a comment in English would be able to search for something in English. I don’t know why that would sound silly. I frequently search for stuff in Spanish and French, neither of which is my primary language. Moreover, your perspective hinged on the assumption that Nite has never been to the US, while I was acting from a perspective that s/he had never been to Arizona. S/he never asked what Denny’s was; rather, it was Coco’s about which s/he lacked clarity.
I didn’t say that using the word “diddlytot” was serious; I said it wasn’t satirical.
A desire for conversation means that the writer actually chooses to contribute to said conversation. You had an opportunity to participate in a discussion on the subject and even to offer a greater elaboration on the topic, but instead you chose to concentrate your efforts on making a deprecatory comment.
This really has been most lovely, but I am moving on to debating subjects that are more relevant to larger social issues.
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By Dani on Jun 11, 2009
Lenebean you are actually coming across overly aggresive considering Catastrophe was obviously making a joke but also making a fair point.
I too, do not know what Denny’s is as I do not live in any of the stated areas, so I can totally see where he is coming from.
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By Catastrophe on Jun 12, 2009
Lene you like taking words purposefully out of context and altering things for your own means.
The Non-English example was refering to you stating something that only certain people would understand (mostly from US) on a blog where people from all over the world read and expecting everyone to know what you are talking about by comparing it to something else which is limited to mostly the US. My comment was initially in good fun but you replied rather aggresively to.
Because YOU don’t find something satirical/amusing does not mean it isnt.
And final point: I was not speaking on behalf of Nite. I was speaking on behalf of me and anyone else who was not familiar with neither Coco’s nor Denny’s.
But you knew that right?
Way to be a douche about a simple comment and then hanging on every single point I made.
Thats me done with this “issue”.
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By Lance on Jun 13, 2009
ok TJ you and Phil need to go to THE GOOD EGG on 83rd back past the Arrowhead Mall and order what me and Mandi like to call French Toast Orgy. It is called the Four Peaks French Toast or something like that its awesome.
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By Canth on Jun 13, 2009
Got who?
That 3rd video is awesome. I enjoy Mika. He’s got a whole lot of Freddy Mercury sound going on, and it’s a good thing.
Look up some other songs on the tube. (Grace Kelly/Relax).
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By Kapu on Jun 14, 2009
Would someone please direct me to the Butterfly Lounge? I would like to get myself a big lady.
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