You must follow the rules you lay out
May 11th, 2009 | by TJ |Internet, I had a tough choice this morning.
Do I write a blog post before or after I attempt to give the dog a bath?
While I was pondering this, I received an email directing me to get my fingers moving, and ending with the following line:
Be blessed with the sign of the W, the A, the S and the D. The Up, the Right, the Down and the Left. The four directions that permeate ALL gaming.
How am I to deny that?
I may come back to you after I bathe the dog, but for now, I have a question. I know that some of you readers have been married or otherwise cohabiting with your significant others for long periods of time. I am perfectly comfortable with the fact that now that we are not exactly “dating,” our interactions with each other are on a more day-to-day level than event-to-event level, if that makes sense. That is, we don’t only see each other to go out or do something together. We see each other… always. Yeah. Pretty much always.
So, with such constant exposure to each other, sometimes things get a little weird. However, are things really that weird? When you’re single and around couples, they seem so normal. Sure, maybe they have little inside jokes or they’re a little overly affectionate, but all around, they seem like average every day people who probably do average every day couple things. It’s just that until you’re in a situation where you are with your significant other every single day, it is impossible to really know what average ordinary every day couples do when no one can see them.
Having convinced myself, however, that I am pretty much a shining example of mediocrity and averageness, and that if I do/think/say something, there are very likely to be 6 million people who do/think/say the same things (I find this thought extremely comforting), it only stands to reason that behind closed doors?
ALL COUPLES ARE ACTUALLY INSANE.
See example that follows, and please then fill out the survey below (cleverly disguised as the comments section), telling the world… I mean, just me, of course… the strange things you and your significant other do behind closed doors (not THOSE closed doors. Nothing dirty, that’s for another day).
*****
TJ: How long are we going to keep doing this?
Phil: Until someone gives up!
TJ: I’m not giving up.
Phil: I’m not giving up either.
TJ: This can’t go on forever.
Phil: So give up.
TJ: Psh. Do YOU give up yet?
Phil: Nope.
TJ: How about now?
Phil: *attacks*
TJ: Haha, you gave UP!
Phil: I did not give up, I went in for the kill shot.
TJ: Well, I’m not dead, so obviously you did not succeed. I win.
Phil: I didn’t give up!
TJ: Well leaving the room counts as giving up!
Phil: I didn’t lose.
TJ: I won. It is unmanly and unsportmanslike of you to not admit defeat when you are beaten.
Phil: I wasn’t beaten! It was a kill shot!
TJ: Well it didn’t KILL me and you walked away, thus by your own “whoever gives up first” rules, I AM THE WINNER.
Phil: Well, I suppose I can let you have this one…
TJ: OH NO YOU DON’T. Don’t you pull that “letting you win” crap with me! You came up with the rules!
Phil: I came up with the game!
TJ: You did not! I threw a pillow at you first!
Phil: But I threw it back.
TJ: … touche.
By Ambrosyne on May 11, 2009
*giggles*
That…yeah…we’ve totally had moments like that. I can’t think of any specific examples offhand, but that’s likely because there’s too many of them.
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By Tchann on May 11, 2009
I drew about 25 comic strips taken directly from conversations with my husband. It illustrates perfectly exactly how weird we actually are. :)
words.comicgen.com
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By Liz on May 11, 2009
Yes yes. It is very ‘normal’ to have situation like that. For example, I will say ‘I am the boss’. He says “I only let you think you are the boss, because I am the real boss”. I will go”I only let you think you let me be the boss to boost your ego” and on and on and on.
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By Bruennor on May 11, 2009
Omg Yes. I can’t the number of times my wife and I have discussions like this. We act like little brats arguing over who did it first.
Of course I always take the high ground and let her win. :-p At least thats what I think. Or….
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By Gauntlet on May 11, 2009
We pretty much run with “When rules are not yet defined for a conversation or argument (of which almost all are light-hearted), whoever declares themselves to win first is the winner.” So, for us? You would have won.
Also, yes. Couples do weird things. She constantly reminds me that “What’s mine is mine, and what’s yours is mine”, which I agree to, and then kiss her on the forehead and tell her that “you’re mine”.
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By Melme on May 11, 2009
Lol! Yeah, me and my hubby do stuff like this all the time. I’ll even turn to him in the middle of some silliness and ask him what he thinks our friends would think if they knew how silly we are at home.
One of my favorites was a pillow war (I gathered all the pillows in our room into a pile on the bed and threw myself on them screeching “THEY’RE MINE!” The winner was whoever ended up with the pillows when we were exhausted) that turned into a tickle fight (He got all the pillows and I hate losing. He hates being tickled!) (^_^)
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By Tartdarling on May 11, 2009
Haha, yup all couples are insane. Proven fact. I’ve had a similar pillow fight argument. The really fun ones are the who actually cleaned something debates. Try establishing rules for that one, it never goes well. :)
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By Alex on May 11, 2009
My boyfriend has been known to say: “Do you think people would believe that we act like this?” We are so weird together. From non-sense arguments and insults to bustin’ dance moves in the kitchen… it’s a very special kind of love.
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By Anna on May 11, 2009
Insanity is an essential part of my marriage.
It’s just how we roll! (I may try the pillow war thing, as he steals the covers. It’s only fair!)
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By Kestrel on May 11, 2009
My wife and I will celebrate 35 years of wedded insanity on June 22. We’re probably both certifiably nuts for putting up with each other that long (my wife is definitely the more insane; I’m not easy to live with!).
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By lux on May 11, 2009
my boyfriend has a habit, when we’re cuddling, of dropping his entire self on me and gleefully exclaiming “DEADWEIGHT!” while i giggle retardedly beneath him. it only ends when i resort to tickles.
i think it’s these silly things that people can do in relationships that make them truly awesome. it shows that you can have fun together and you don’t need to be out *doing* anything. (:
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By Orion on May 11, 2009
Oh, yeah, couples are insane.
Periodically my wife will harass me about my snoring, at which point I will regale her with the litany of things she does while sleeping (steal covers, bed space, pillows, etc.), usually to heavy laughter and the reminder that I still snore.
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By KT on May 11, 2009
Heh, yeah, you’re normal. For us it’s fighting over who doesn’t care the MOST about what we have for dinner. Then we end up getting the takeout menus and gradually narrowing them down until we end up with one. Then we argue for 20 min. about who has to call the place: “But I made the decision about the food, so you have to call.” “But I am paying from my wallet, so you have to call” “But that’s our money anyway, so you still have to call.”
Etc. to infinite. Also with the TV. “What do you want to watch?” “Gossip Girl” “Not Gossip Girl, what else do you want to watch?” “Gossip Girl” “Do you want to watch 24 or Lost?” “Gossip Girl.” “*sigh* Okay we’re watching Lost.” “Meh.”
Proceed to me making saracastic comments throughout the entire show.
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By Bernie on May 12, 2009
Women win because men “give up”. Women do not give up. The only way for a woman to “give up” is to “SHUT UP”. Women do not “SHUT UP”. The silent treatment from women is not shutting up because women are still thinking about whatever set them off. When men give the silent treatment they are thinking about sports, the TV schedule, video games, male up sex.
Men learn from their mothers to give up. I think it is some kind of conspiracy .
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By Windle on May 12, 2009
For us it’s not just about the insanity, it’s EVOLVING insanity. Example: An argument in my household that doesn’t involve a serious motive used to automatically degenerate into a sullenly playful ‘…dumb boy.’, ‘…stupid girl.’.
Then we watched ‘Wall-E’.
Now she is most likely to walk over to me, lightly punch my shoulder, and mumble ‘Whoawhoawhoa…Mo.’
To which I have no recourse but to answer ‘Wrong!’
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By Riverter on May 12, 2009
I submit to you that what you shared is a perfect example of what being a couple is all about, you don’t have to have a major plan for every day, you simply enjoy each other and take what adventures come.
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By Gamer Girl on May 13, 2009
You used my signature from my email! How cool is that! I’m an internetz celebrity.
My husband and I are weird like that too. Some times we’ll be laying in bed and he’ll do a mock coyote howl while saying “I love you” so then we alternate back and forth this howling “I love you” until we’re laughing so hard I can’t breathe.
Or there are times when I’m being a pain in the ass and he give me “the look” and I can’t help but giggle and he’ll start smiling while trying to keep a straight face and then we both end up laughing at the other.
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