The post where I display blatant cultural ignorance
December 22nd, 2009 | by TJ |So, Internet, today I figure you’ve got one of two things going on:
Either:
You’re at work, and pretty much nothing is going on and you’re bored out of your mind and your place of business is totally empty (or you work retail in which case you’re not even reading this), or
Two, you’re at home, finishing up your Christmas preparations.
In either case, I have totally prepared something awesome for you!
Check it out, Internet.
Whether you are stuck at work or at home dealing with all the last minute shit work that makes you wish that Christmas would just hurry up and be over with already, I totally have been thinking of you and your predicament and the fact that your Christmas spirit may be ebbing away, and have SWOOPED IN WITH MY SWOOPING SWOOPINESS (actually, that’s mostly just arm flab, I haven’t really been doing many curls in the last few… evers) TO SAVE CHRISTMAS.
TJ’S CHRISTMAS PLAYLIST AWESOMENESS!
All you have to do is press play and listen to TWELVE delightful songs of Christmas awesomeness, handpicked, BY ME FOR YOU, to raise your Christmas spirit. You’re welcome!
PS – Warning/Disclaimer – If you are in the first group, you know, the group of people at work today, might I recommend you enjoy this Christmas playlist with headphones unless you are working in a more liberal environment who might see the humor in a charming and spirited ditty entitled “I’ve Got a Boner for Christmas?”
PPS – I am totally aware there is a third group that doesn’t even celebrate Christmas at all but making that first playlist took a really long time, come ON, I don’t have time to make a whole other non-secular playlist!
EDIT: I have come up with a brilliant THIRD usage of my excellent TJ’S CHRISTMAS PLAYLIST OF AWESOMENESS. Should you be having a holiday party of sorts, and you press play on TJ’S CHRISTMAS PLAYLIST OF AWESOMENESS, it will be just like having a little bit of TJ at your holiday party, thus enriching your Christmas experience just a little bit more.
Wow, it just occurred to me that in this way, I could end up being present at Christmas parties ACROSS THE WORLD.
Which would kind of make me like Santa.
I’M PRACTIALLY SANTA.
I really need you all to press play.
RIGHT NOW.
By Adlib on Dec 22, 2009
Thanks, TJ! I will enjoy it when I get home. I am actually at work, but we are insanely busy right now (I wish we weren’t…would make my life easier), but I had to take a time out to see what you had to say. :)
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By Skraps on Dec 22, 2009
I work in a library. Turns out that the only people that come to the library the days leading up to Christmas are the wana-be thug children that think they are “street” even though they live in the suburbs. and the homeless guys that “shower” in the bathroom sinks.
plus side, being one of the worshiped “Computer Guys” I have librarian baked tasty treats surrounding me right now.
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By Skraps on Dec 22, 2009
p.s. TJ you got me in trouble. I forwarded a few choice lines from Boner for Christmas to Mrs. Skraps. She says I’m not allowed to play with you anymore, and she wants to talk to your mom. (Actually she thought it was quite funny, but is still mildly disturbed)
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By Awlbiste on Dec 22, 2009
I am in the 2nd part of the first group and now after a crazy retail shift I will be pressing play. Thanks Santa TJ!
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By marymac on Dec 22, 2009
you ARE Santa!
Love your ipod, Santa! ;)
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By Iain on Dec 22, 2009
Your playlist has reached New Zealand! I wonder if it’ll hit Europe at all.
It’s a good playlist too, and doesn’t include Snoopy’s Christmas so I’m still winning.
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By Bernie on Dec 23, 2009
I used to dread when I first heard ‘Please Come Home for Christmas’ on the radio because I knew that I would hear it every 12 minutes until New Year’s Day.
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By Bernie on Dec 23, 2009
….and if they EVER played the Bon Jovi version on N’Awlins radio we would burn down the station!!!! WTF!
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By ZombiePirateXXX on Dec 23, 2009
I’m at work but last night I slipped outside and may have broken my toe… I am supposed to be driving from the Midlands down to London tomorrow night too….
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By DJ on Dec 23, 2009
First time commenter long time lover of all things TJ! I am at work and it is SO dead. This will keep me from watching the clock or visiting a website that some pimple faced IT cop is watching me look at. Thanks TJ
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By TheWicked on Dec 23, 2009
I’d probably really enjoy your playlist if I didn’t DESPISE christmas music with every fiber of my being. I used to not mind it, until I had this one coworker that played christmas music all day, every day from December 1st until christmas.
Now there is only one christmas song I enjoy. The White Zombie version of Jingle Bells is just pure win.
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By Carrie on Dec 23, 2009
I will try to enjoy this when I get home! Just the title implies that this is a playlist I will adore, (If you really love Christmas, come on and let it SNOW! Awesome movie.) If you’ve got the Porky Pig version of Blue Christmas in there too… well, we’ll see about that when I get to listen. :)
I am at work, and it is really horrid here today. With luck I only have a few hours left though, then I get to go home and do some crazy cleaning before hubby’s family gets here tomorrow! GAH!
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