It’s a Dollar Store Christmas, y’all.
December 17th, 2009 | by TJ |
We’re not really “doing” Christmas this year. We’re not going to be able to make it to Pennsylvania to be with my family like last year – plane tickets just aren’t in the budget for us this year, like for a lot of people.
We’re not going to be able to go be with his family, either. It’s a lot closer, but it’s still quite a drive and his car needs new tires and the dog would need to be boarded and we’d need a hotel and it would add up just as quickly.
So we’ve decided to just stay here.
We’ve got a dog and four cats in the house, so a tree is somewhat impractical. Has impractical ever stopped me from doing anything? See solution above.
I was actually quite content to go without a tree – I hadn’t even thought of it, really – but every time I talked to my mother recently, she would ask about our decorations, or our plans, or our tree and she just sounded so bummed out. It was like, ok, fine, she would deal with the fact that I was not coming to PA for Christmas, but I damn well better make sure I was having a near identical Christmas out here in Arizona.
I don’t think I need to tell you that there are some fundamental differences between Pennsylvania and Arizona Christmases, but I will let that slide for now.
So, for my mother’s benefit came my beautiful tree, which has since been attacked by the cat and Phil’s ridiculous need to run the ceiling fan and has fallen off the wall, but I am all together too sad to show you what it looks like in its current state. The whole treeing of the wall, actually, was pretty sad, when you think about it – me standing alone in the bedroom, decorating a wall, singing “I wish me a merry Christmas” to myself, standing next to a giant pile of gifts sent by mail:
It’s an unusual Christmas for me, Internet, to be certain. However, unusual is not to say that it is not AWESOME. I mean, who do you think you’re talking to? Phil’s got a whole week off. We’re going to go to a hockey game. We’re going to open presents by mail, probably at 4am when my mother calls, completely disrespectful of time differences. We’re going to play a lot of WoW and have Chinese food from the LaToya Jackson buffet and see a movie.
And? Eat things off of my new plates, thus completely justifying their purchase!
Obviously, we have some new and excellent holiday traditions in the making here.
By Tchann on Dec 17, 2009
I love our Christmas tree. It’s a huge artificial one that we got for free off of Craig’s List. It’s big enough that I can hang all of my ornaments on it, just out of reach of our cat. XD
The topper is a handmade Banjo puppet. ^.^
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TJ Reply:
December 18th, 2009 at 12:44 am
I think when we do have our own place with no cats, we will definitely go fake. Phil wants a big tacky white one.
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By BugginWord on Dec 17, 2009
I’m with you. Yay for Skype and boxes of wine!
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TJ Reply:
December 18th, 2009 at 12:45 am
Well, this isn’t our ideal situation, but we’re definitely going to make the best of it this year.
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By Syxx on Dec 17, 2009
Looks awsome TJ and why justify a purchase when you can let people asume theres a use for them other than to look cool
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TJ Reply:
December 18th, 2009 at 12:45 am
Thank you!
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By Awlbiste on Dec 17, 2009
I got some Kahlua (I almost never drink so for me it’s a treat) and I will be buying a Papa Murphy’s bake-it-at-your-own-damn-house pizza and a CHOCOLATE PIE. And I will also be opening boxes.
Although probably just one box from my mom and her husband. Maybe one from my grandparents. Oh yeah and the mystery box from Rehevkor. So maybe 3 boxes. WHOO!
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TJ Reply:
December 18th, 2009 at 12:46 am
We’re thinking about getting a bake-it-at-your-own-damn-house ham.
You know. For tradition.
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By Bernie on Dec 17, 2009
You totally missed your chance to decorate a cactus for Christmas. You could have dressed it up like Santa.
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TJ Reply:
December 18th, 2009 at 12:47 am
Cactus + me totally don’t mix. I’m really tilty.
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By Iain on Dec 17, 2009
It’s astounding that Phil can’t get you guys airlifted so you can make a drop insertion* to your parents’ house.
What is the point of him being in the military if he can’t do that??**
* “drop insertion” is almost certainly my made-up term for parachuting down to a location. …and I think I put that apostrophe in the wrong place.
** No, actually, I’m sure you can tell I’m not being serious here. Never mind.
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I like the tree. I remember back when I lived in Hawera, a family had a house with a door that always stayed open. But they shut it on Christmas day, and on the side you never saw they had spray painted a large christmas tree. But yours has flashing lights, so it possibly trumps theirs.
Whose is the third stocking?
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Awlbiste Reply:
December 17th, 2009 at 9:36 pm
I assumed it was Brinkley’s stocking.
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TJ Reply:
December 18th, 2009 at 12:46 am
It IS Brinkley’s stocking!
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By Iain on Dec 17, 2009
Oh… those’re leaves, not lights.
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TJ Reply:
December 18th, 2009 at 12:47 am
Nope. Lights. Garland with built in garland lights.
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lenebean Reply:
December 19th, 2009 at 10:41 am
Is it garland with built in lights or lights with built in garland?
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By Turtlechelle on Dec 18, 2009
I live in a 5-pet household as well, and haven’t had a tree for 3 years (since we adopted our psycho attack-kitty). You can consider that wall tree idea stolen. Awesome solution.
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