I don’t get it, and DON’T explain
January 20th, 2010 | by TJ |One of the most snotty, obnoxious things that someone can say is “I don’t get it.” I’m not talking about when you’re trying to learn something mathy and it’s totally not sinking in. I mean when you see someone doing something or behaving a certain way, and it’s not something that you would choose to do or believe that you would ever do, so you say “I don’t get it,” with a kind of eyeroll and superior attitude.
That being said, here are some things I totally don’t get.
Bed Making: Ok, I know it’s a totally juvenile thing to say. I know that this is the kind of excuse a 12 year old uses thinking that it’s the height of logic. However, I DON’T GET BED MAKING. One, who likes tucked sheets? No one likes tucked sheets. You put all this effort into tucking sheets, and then you’ve just got to yank them out when you want to go to sleep.
Two, and you knew this was coming, I AM JUST GOING TO GET BACK IN.
Follow me here.
Say I was a bedmaker. I get up between 9 and 10 usually, long after Phil has gone to work. If I get up at 10am, being reasonable about things, I would probably get around to making the bed by 11am at the latest. After, you know, some morning stuff. So the bed gets made at 11am and I leave the bedroom for the rest of the day. Phil comes home around 4 and enters the bedroom for the two and a half minutes it takes to change out of his uniform. The bedroom again remains unoccupied until Phil gets in bed, effectively UNmaking it, at about 9pm. I climb in around 1 or 2am, throwing blankets and untucking things in an even more willy nilly fashion.
So the bed was made for a total of 10 hours. During those 10 hours, someone was in the bedroom for about two and a half minutes. At the end of the 10 hours, it is immediately unmade so it can be used. Who has appreciated the made bed? No one. Who gets woken up with an elbow to the face or knee to the gut when I have to climb into my made half of the bed and start yanking and pulling on sheets and blankets to dig myself an acceptable hole and reconstruct PillowBlanket mountain? Phil.
NO ONE WINS.
Local news commercials: Not the commercials that say “What common item do you use every single day may be giving you cancer of the every organ? FIND OUT AT ELEVEN.” I mean these random clip commercials set to music that our local stations seem to play all the time. It’s a montage of the local anchors and weather people acting “crazy” and spinning around in their chairs to smile at the camera and whimsically throwing balled up paper at each other, or peeping over the edge of the news desk like they were totally hiding under there. And it’s all set to songs talking about how far they’ve come and how the best is yet to come and that kind of stuff.
I guess it’s supposed to make us think, “Wow, look at those semi-famous local news people acting just like normal people! They even do silly things! Who would have thought that marginally recognizable late night news anchors could act just like I do sometimes? I’m glad they showed me this fanciful collection of hilarity, because I care. And I AM excited about what my local news team is going to get up to in the future. I mean, it’s not like they just report news that happens without their influence in any way. I’m really psyched to see how this team of wacky individuals and unique personalities is going to develop over time!”
EXCEPT NO BECAUSE I DON’T CARE. I don’t even know their names. They’re generic heads with generic accents that spout news. I’m a total asshole, I know, but I care as much about the behind the scenes happenings at the news station as I do about the stockroom happenings at my local grocery store. And that’s pretty much not at all. This is what happens when you give people their own news station. They start to think people give a crap.
Look, Internet, if you’re a bed maker, or you’re a local news anchor, I don’t really care to hear your arguments for bed making or montage clips that make me feel somehow closer to the guy who gives the traffic report. I am never going to be a bedmaker, and I am never going to like those commercials. Ever. I just don’t get it. I can’t be reasoned with. I will never change my mind.
What I will give you, though, is a window. An amnesty of sorts. Like I said above, it’s pretty snotty and obnoxious to spout off “I don’t get it” about something everyone else seems to do and/or enjoy. However, today, I am interested in hearing what you just don’t get. What habits do other people have that just don’t make sense to you? What shenanigans do people seem to get up to that defy every shred of your own logic? Spill it in the comments.
PS – Folding underwear. WHY?
By Chibi Jeebs on Jan 20, 2010
HA! Chebbar would agree with you on the bed making and underwear folding. Well, except his boxers: those get folded. I don’t really understand his underwear folding thought process.
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TJ Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 12:28 pm
WHY FOLD? To keep them from getting wrinkled? WHO IS GOING TO SEE WRINKLY UNDERPANTS?
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Chibi Jeebs Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 12:33 pm
You fold so that they’ll fit into the drawer neatly, in stacks, instead of flopping around all willy-nilly with your period pants mixing with your regular unders who are infiltrating your fancy pants and GAH.
Signed,
OCD Much.
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Liz Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 5:56 pm
Yes agree, and also able to find the ones I want to wear. Besides like Chibi said there are fancy ones, period ones, and regular ones.
But I don’t make up beds, not even when there are visitors in the house. Why waste the time just need to get back in however many hours later? And I can’t think of other things that “I don’t get it”, very OCD. More the other way around I am sure that other people will shake their heads at the things I do. :)
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Awlbiste Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 1:15 pm
Josh does not fold any laundry at all whatsoever and when he visits I do his laundry and fold it all nice and feel all smug and superior and help-y for the few days until he gets back home and it all becomes unfolded again.
I don’t make my bed (unless the realtor is showing the house or when I do my once a week house cleaning) but I do fold all my clothes and all my underwear and even roll up my socks all nice. I like my things “just so” and my “just so” is having clothes folded. Your “just so” is unfolded and they both work!
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Skraps Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 1:30 pm
I fold all the laundry in the house. Mrs skraps doesnt fold anything, it sits in a basket till she wears it then she throws it on the floor when it is dirty. This bothers me to no end. Dirty clothes go in a basket, clean clothes folded in the drawer. And everything is folded. Socks. underwear. Everything! And the bed is made every morning!
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Adlib Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 1:34 pm
Wow, the laundry sitting in the basket thing is what my husband does all the time. He occasionally will fold or hang his dress shirts, but his socks and underwear will sit in a laundry basket in the middle of the hallway(!!) until I get tired of tripping over it, and then I will fold them myself.
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By Lady Jess on Jan 20, 2010
I’m completely with you on the bed making and news commercials. My personal just don’t get it thing is…wearing a baby. I see it all the time, slings and wraps in all sorts of cutesy colors and designs, with the little baby in it, attached to Mommy. I’ve been pregnant twice, and have two kids to show for it. And at the end of each 9 month period, All I wanted was that little person OUT of my body. Hold the baby, totally cool. WEAR the child on my chest/belly area after already carrying it IN there for 9 months? I just don’t get it.
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TJ Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 12:31 pm
I used to feel exactly that way. Like, serious, you can’t just use an arm? Then I babysat two kids at once, one who refused to be put down. Ever.
You definitely present an interesting baby in/BABY OFF argument.
From a practicality standpoint (you can’t make PB&J for the 3 year old when the baby will not be set down) it makes sense. I am with you, though, on the people who make baby wearing into some kind of cultish religion. I think as soon as you’re calling it “baby wearing” you’ve kind of crossed a line. For me, it wasn’t wearing a baby, it was like… hands-free baby. Convenience baby.
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Liz Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 5:50 pm
People put baby in the sling, so they can have their hands free, and actually be able to do things that require their hands, like most of the houseworks. Or if you go shopping, you can actually pick up clothes off the rack and exam them with your free hands.
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Lady Jess Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 6:07 pm
I get the hands free thing I do, I needed that at times too but I also had my kids 16 years ago. We had playpens, swings, strollers and such to be hands free and my kids didn’t mind those. Or the carseats that attached to the shopping carts. The idea of wearing your kids didn’t exist then, and my kids never minded not being held every moment they were awake.
Also, I’m not talking about hey I’m gonna use this sling because the baby is fussing and I have things to do. I’m talking about the people that think you’re “OMG BAD MOMMY!!” if you don’t “wear your child” every minute of every day, like TJ said above.
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By Coranada on Jan 20, 2010
I completely agree with the bed making thing. Plus, too many times I’ve suddenly had a chance (as well as need) for a nap but hated to mess up an unmade bed. Now I refuse.
I’ve had friends that do that television sleeping thing. You know the kind where they lay under the blankets like someone slipped them under there neatly and they get out and just have to flip the covers back up? Okay, for those people making the bed is great. If that’s all it took I’d do it too.
Otherwise, forget it.
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TJ Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 1:28 pm
I cannot television sleep. I have a body pillow that I need to roll with me every time I roll over. Which is a lot.
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Skraps Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 1:32 pm
The nap during the day thing is solved by having a quilt neatly folded on top of the comforter. Nap with the quilt and fold when you are done.
(huh, I didn’t know I was anal till this message came up. who knew?)
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By Adlib on Jan 20, 2010
Ack! I fold underwear, but I am afraid to explain. Actually, it’s just so it will fit better in my underwear drawer. My husband doesn’t get it either so I understand. It’s really my college roommate’s fault. She showed me how to do it.
On bed making – exactly. The only thing I care about is just tucking in the bottom corners of the sheet so the whole mess doesn’t slide off the bed. My husband is pretty good at destroying it while sleeping.
Something I don’t get–on the bed subject, my husband can’t just roll over. He literally thrashes around and wakes me up all the time. I tell him to roll over gently, but it seems impossible for him to do it.
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TJ Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 1:20 pm
Phil is a total tucker. He would even sleep with it tucked if it weren’t for me. After he’s had a shot at getting the bed all made, the first thing I do when I get in is deliberately untuck everything. YOU CAN’T SLEEP LIKE THAT.
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Flaime Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 3:21 pm
The military does that to you. You have to do extra pushups if you don’t. And nobody likes extra pushups.
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By Awlbiste on Jan 20, 2010
Oh yeah, I forgot this: I HATE TOP SHEETS. I hate them so much. I just HATE THEM. Okay I think that’s all.
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TJ Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 1:19 pm
SO DO I! I don’t GET IT. But Phil is all about the top sheet. He sleeps under it and a blanket. JUST LIKE THAT. Blanket on top of sheet on top of Phil. It gets all TANGLED AND RIDICULOUS.
I NEVER used a top sheet before him. I had a closet full of top sheets, still folded with the packaging cardboard stuck in between. BECAUSE THEY’RE DUMB.
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Awlbiste Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 1:22 pm
I am extremely picky about my Sleeping Situation. It really has to be just about perfect in order for me to get any sleep and stay asleep through the night.
I use a quilt and then on top a comforter (in the Summer just a quilt) and pretty much just wrap myself like a burrito with the quilt underneath my feet and then some more quilt placed strategically to support my arms and boobs.
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Adlib Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 1:31 pm
Ha! I’m like Phil like that because I have to have a top sheet between me and the blanket. I guess part of it is liking the feel of cool sheets upon getting in. The other part? I don’t know. I think it might be because I like having the whole set together, fitted, top, comforter, even the bed skirt has to be there.
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Skraps Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 1:34 pm
Maybe you need to buy better sheets? Try something with a really high thread count like 600+. They are soft like silk but warm like flannel mmmmmm.
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Tae Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 2:43 pm
The top sheet thing is annoying, I agree. It gets tangled up around your legs when you move.
The reason for having it though is so that you (theoretically) have something between your body that likes to leak oils, sweat, dead skin etc, and the blanket. It is a way to not have to wash the blanket/comforter as often as you would your sheets. That is the way I have always understood it.
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Awlbiste Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 2:49 pm
Either way you have to wash something. Sheet or quilt.
Also “leak oils” cracked me up.
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By Chaninn on Jan 20, 2010
My “I don’t get it” thing is when anyone (especially my husband) starts a project as we are ready to go somewhere. For example, it’s a holiday & we are going to a party…we both have coats and keys…he will start the dishes!
Me: What are you doing?
Him: Putting these away, duh.
Me: WHY??? We’re ready to go!
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Chaninn Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 1:25 pm
Also, he usually looks sheepishly around and stops when I say “WHY???”
I just don’t get why he’d start dishes when we’re all dressed and ready to head out somewhere.
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By Tchann on Jan 20, 2010
Re: news ‘commercials’
1) Because I’m a sticker about this, those aren’t commercials. At most they are ‘promos’, since they aren’t paid for.
2) Those types of promos are usually what’s known as a ‘Station ID’ – a legally required identifier that all television stations must air at least once an hour. Many stations with news departments choose to make a cute promo with identifying talent (newscasters) to accomplish this, instead of a boring slate that reads “YOU ARE WATCHING WWWW – CHANNEL 65″.
3) By the way, I work in television. >.>
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By HokieJayBee on Jan 20, 2010
a more recent phenomenon i don’t get is the abuse of the DVR. not the DVR in general, i mean i get that concept, fancy pants VCR with no tapes. conveniently programmable.
but i’ve got a couple different friends/couples who over-DVR. like, have had to buy additional external hard drives to keep all their DVR’ing. they’ve got seasons and seasons of crap they’ve seen and just won’t delete. they’ve got seasons and seasons of shows they have never seen, but “might like that show one day”.
no one likes TV that much. no one has *that* amount of time to clear out that much DVR’ing. seriously, quit pack-ratting TV shows. when you’re spending hundreds of dollars for additional external hard drives to keep all your shows around, i don’t get it.
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Firespirit Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 2:08 pm
But, arent you also paying hundreds of dollars to packrat those tv shows on DVD?
I am a HUGE fan of DVD on TV – no commercials = WIN!
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Adlib Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 2:42 pm
I only keep stuff I know I’ll watch again. Other than that, I can’t stop from cleaning up the DVR. Too much clutter!
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Awlbiste Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 2:43 pm
I would sneak into their house at night and delete it. THEY WOULD NEVER EVEN NOTICE.
Packrat behaviors make me so angry. YOU DON’T NEED ALL THAT STUFF JUST THROW IT AWAY. One of my aunts is a hoarder, my anger is totally justified.
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By Joonces on Jan 20, 2010
I also “don’t get” bedmaking. Unless you’re having company that you know will look in your bedroom. That is the only exception.
Bedmaking = wrong
Scientific Proof!!! http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/4181629.stm
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By Firespirit on Jan 20, 2010
TJ:
I am TOTALLY with you on both of these things. Seriously. Who the hell cares if I make the bed, anyway?
My roomie always watches the news. I freaking hate it. Who cares? When I was back in freshman psycology, the first thing they taught me was to NEVER watch the news before going to bed. I mean, really. News is news. But news is only news because its pretty much… negative. If you watch the news at night, swap it up and stop for a week. I GUARANTEE you will get better sleep.
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Adlib Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 2:43 pm
I totally agree. I never watch the news. If I want to know what’s going on, I read the news. I never watch it. (I still manage to stay well informed.)
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Liz Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 5:57 pm
There are no good news anyway, always bad things on the news. So depressing!
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By Wolfmane on Jan 20, 2010
I actually had a GF that would make hospital corners. She didn’t like having the sheets loose.
I’m more the no bed making, loose sheet kind of guy, so I always used to tease her ruthlessly about the ‘starchy’ bed covers and the loss of heating efficiency due to the increased air space from the tight sheet ‘tent’ effect.
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By Suzy on Jan 20, 2010
Tucked sheets and made up beds are silly and a total waste of time. And as far as tv news, I don’t feel the need to turn that on, the internet has all the news I need to see without the bobbleheads reading it to me and joking with each other.
What I don’t get is smoking. I congratulate you for quitting!! As I watch my parents’ health decline and name off the laundry list of health issues they have that were caused by it (heart by-pass, stroke, COPD, and more!)and couple that with the monetary cost.. Why do people start smoking in the first place?
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By Ylee on Jan 20, 2010
Okay, I will admit it, I’m OCD. But I can’t sleep in a bed where the sheets aren’t tucked in using a nurse’s corner. (my mother is a nurse) I just can’t do it, it feels wrong. My wife on the other hand, untucks her side of the foot of the bed to let her feet get air. Um, no, if my feet get air, I don’t get sleep.
I have even bought sheets and sewn the top sheet to the bottom of the fitted sheet so it will stay tucked.
Also, things I don’t get, if you have a patterned sheet, why the hell would you put the pattern side up so that when you fold the sheet back you see the whiteish side of the sheet, instead of the pretty side. I mean, there is a blanket on top so it isn’t like you are ever going to see the pretty side if you do it that way….
I’m just saying…
Yes, yes, very OCD and AR.
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By Ylee on Jan 20, 2010
Oh, and I fold all my underwear too. How would you put it in a drawer if you didn’t?
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By Keith on Jan 20, 2010
The real reason for bedmaking is that it is a battle against entropy.
Each day that you don’t make the bed, you bed situation gets a little worse- sheets start sliding to one side or the other, blankets start to turn sideways, pillows get twisted in their cases, etc.
Making the bed each day fights back the entropy!
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By Tess on Jan 20, 2010
I don’t get eating sunflower seeds. Such a HEINOUS amount of work/spitting, for so little reward!
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By Delicia on Jan 20, 2010
Bedmaking is just stupid. The only time I make our bed is if we have company coming over that haven’t yet had a “tour” of the house (since we recently moved in).. For that I’ll make the bed. Otherwise my bedroom door is shut.
No, I don’t make my kids make their beds.. sometimes we do have double-standards (kids can’t/adults can – like eating food in the bedrooms), but I draw the line at bed-making. I am however pretty strict about them keeping their dirty clothes in hampers while mine are free to lounge about my bedroom floor.
Yeah I fold underwear for space concerns – we don’t have a lot of dressers.
Some thing I don’t “get”:
Why my father-in-law delights in DVRing movies that he ALREADY HAS ON DVD!
him: “Yeah but now it’s already on the TV so I can just play it”
Me: *sputter* but it’s probably edited for time or content, and has commercials…and you have it sitting RIGHT OVER THERE next to the TV on DVD?!
him: but.. it’s already on there and I can just play it.
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By Rhonda on Jan 20, 2010
I don’t get people who stop with their trolley in the middle of the aisle in the supermarket – especially when it’s crowded.
Nobody can get around them, but they leave it there while they take 50 bajillion years to decide which brand of cereal they want. I just want to get past and get out of there, supermarket makes me grumpy enough. GET OUT OF MY WAY!
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By Flaime on Jan 20, 2010
Regarding bed making – I have dogs that like to get on the bed. So, once the bed has had 4 or 5 hours to air dry (or after I get home from work, whatever the case may be) tend tend to make the bed so the sheets don’t get dirty. But, it is healthier to not make the bed – keeps the bacterial levels in the linens down. If you make the bed first thing in the morning, it’s all moist and warm and the dust mites and such just love that.
I don’t watch TV and therefore cannot comment on local TV new commercials.
Re underwear folding – I like to fold my underwear because underwear belongs in one half of the drawer, whilst socks belong in the other half. If there is no folding, there is unnatural sock/underwear intermingling…which is unnatural.
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By Aunt Becky on Jan 20, 2010
What about people who IRON THEIR SHEETS?
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Chelle Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 3:35 pm
What about people whom iron underwear….my grandma has done it for my grandpa for over 60 years….
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Liz Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 6:00 pm
And ironed Jeans…
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TheWicked Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 9:33 pm
I don’t get ironing period. To me it’s the same as the bed making argument. I’m just going to wear it later. When I wear it, it is going to get wrinkly and stuff. So why iron it? I don’t get it.
And people who tuck their shirts. I mean I do it at work because I have to. But really what is the point? I just don’t get it. I didn’t even tuck in my shirt at my own wedding. I didn’t wear a tie either. I really don’t get ties either. Hey look I’m going to wear this thing to make it easier for my wife to strangle me with! Yeah that’s a brilliant idea.
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By Katy on Jan 20, 2010
I don’t get refrigerating things that clearly do not need to be refrigerated. Honey, syrup, certain cooking oils and peanut butter are just a few things that I’ve seen refrigerated that annoy the heck out of me. I don’t get why you’d take up fridge space for stuff that is just as happy in the cupboard.
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Liz Reply:
January 20th, 2010 at 6:00 pm
Because people think they are going to be go “bad”? Which they won’t, such as PB. Besides putting syrup in the fridge just hardens them up. I found one the other day at my parents’ fridge, so gross!! Can’t pour squat out.
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By Fyurae on Jan 20, 2010
I just have one thing to say:
top sheets are the devil. They get all twisted around your feet in the middle of the night and make it so you cant get out of bed to pee. I dont use top sheets. Whenever I buy bed sets, I turn the topsheet into a curtain or tablecloth or skirt for SCA events.
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By Faith on Jan 20, 2010
I only make my bed because the dog will jump up on there and sleep all afternoon. This way, if she’s been outside before her “nap” and has dirt or poo on her, it is only on the top of the comforter, as opposed to the sheets (The Hubby is NOT fond of slipping into bed with poo on it – go figure!).
What I don’t get – people who play Farmville or Mafia Wars or whatever crap is on Facebook. I so don’t care if you just fertilized some imaginary farm plot or scored some pretend guns. WTF is that all about? I just hide all that crap now… it is so NOT why I am on Facebook….
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By Bernie on Jan 21, 2010
If you are going to fold underwear, you might as well iron it.
Making your bed builds charater.
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By Carrie on Jan 21, 2010
The thing I don’t get is the “acquired taste” thing.
I say to my husband, “No, I don’t want a beer, I don’t like beer very much.”
He says, “Well, it’s an acquired taste.”
I say, “Well, I don’t want to acquire it, is that so hard to understand?”
Then he throws in the cheap card, and on occasion I will cave and have the beer anyway, because Bacardi Raz really is more expensive, even if it is delicious. I like to enjoy the process of getting drunk just as much as being drunk, ok?
But really, if you don’t like something, WHY on earth would you eat or drink it over and over and over again so you can like it later? Why put yourself through it? If you’ve tried it and don’t like it, shouldn’t that be enough?
(p.s. I am not really a lush, beer was just the first thing that came to mind. Honest.)
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James Reply:
January 21st, 2010 at 7:59 am
I totally agree with that aquired taste thing. I have had 2 cups of coffee in my life and neither one tasted good, why on earth would I ever try for a third one and I have been in the Navy for 22 years with lots of late nights. My friends got me to try Scotch one night telling me that it was an aquired taste, it was so awful I was looking for a brick to lick to scrape that taste off my tounge. Guess I wont be aquiring that taste, thank god.
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By Swistle on Jan 21, 2010
I loved this whole post.
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By Ale on Jan 21, 2010
I hate when my husband watches movies that I don’t like when they happen to be on tv that we specifically bought on dvd so he could watch it when I wasn’t there. Put my show back on now and watch Rio Bravo tomorrow when I am shopping with my mom.
It bothers me when the Syfy (and what was wrong with Scifi?) channel advertises a movie that looks interesting 6months before they are actually going to show it. When they actually play it, I don’t care anymore.
Making beds it stupid and the only time I do it when I change the sheets on my bed. What I am going to make the bed even though no one is home 10 hours a day in the off chance that someone may stop by and happen to walk up to our bedroom to evaluate my bed making abilities. This is also why I have the no visitor policy (except my parents – his mom refuses to drive the 20 minutes on a highway so saved there).
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By hydra on Jan 21, 2010
I never understood two people with one big sheet.
I mean one person is going to be a sheet hog. The other will need to fight for a little corner.
Husband and I have our own sheets in one king sized bed. This way he can be all hoggy with it.
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By Thaumaturgos on Jan 21, 2010
When I first discovered wedded bliss, She Who Must Be Obeyed At All Times used to iron everything. I mean EVERYTHING. Towels? Check. Sheets? Check. Tea Towels? Check. UNDERWEAR? Check…
This was a serious ‘I don’t get that’ moment – particularly since I was an undergrad student with a hectic 4 hours a week schedule for lectures and she was working 40 hours a week and she decided I could take over the ironing detail. Ok, ok, fair point. But when she insisted I iron everything that she thought needed ironing – which meant everything – we had a long and detailed conversation. This involved threats of loss of certain – ahem – ‘favours’ and males sleeping on couches. We compromised, by which I mean I caved completely (hey, I missed those ‘favours’ a LOT).
Funnily enough when I got a paying job and she stayed home to raise the offspring that results from successful but unprotected ‘favour’-ing, she took over the ironing again. I discovered that sheets, tea-towels, etc suddenly no longer needed ironing… It’s a funny world
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