How could you resist?
December 4th, 2009 | by TJ |A few posts back… or maybe more than a few, because NaBloPoMo totally threw me off in how many posts I’ve actually done. Like I just got the new Cosmo last night at WalMart when we went out to see if we could find chocolate covered potato chips or chocolate ice cream with pretzels in it or chocolate ice cream with chocolate covered potato chips in it or a chocolate bar composed mostly of salt, which they did have, except it was dark chocolate, ew, and I was very surprised to see the January Cosmo because I feel like I just did Cosmo Cliff Notes a few days ago, but it was actually a couple of weeks ago.
So anyway, in the comments of one of those posts, I think it was a post where I said I was finally running up against a NaBloPoMo wall or something like that, someone mentioned that I’ve mentioned that I have tattoos (I do, five), and that he would be interested to hear a little bit about them and what they mean.
I actually don’t have pictures of most of them (that’s a lie, actually, I think there’s one I don’t have a photograph of), and they’re largely uninteresting to anyone but me (oh, except I have one on my arm that is roughly shaped like a heart, and there’s actually a somewhat interesting story involving the getting of that tattoo, but aside from that, when I was babysitting Noah? One of the first things he ever really said to me was “a hawt! a hawt!” whenever he saw it, like when I pushed my sleeves up to give him a bath, and HOW ADORABLE IS THAT?), but, ANYWAY, I thought I’d tell you about one of them. Specifically, this one:
That was my second tattoo, and while, like I said, most of the actual “meaning” going along with my tattoos is only really relevant to me, it’s not actually any of that stuff where I get some kind of weird design and then try to tell you what each abstract part actually means, and everyone rolls their eyes.
(Yeah. If you’ve got one of those tattoos? People totally roll their eyes when you talk about it. Sorry.)
That is, while the point of my tattoos may not seem very… appropriate or relevant to you, you can, at least, grasp the meaning.
In fact, this one is a song title. I got it when I was 20. I find it hilarious and rife with symbolism and parallels to my 20-year-old life. Most people find it to be more along the lines of “are you fucking serious?“
Yes.Yes, indeed I am.
Give it a chance! It really kicks in to Excellent Mode about two minutes in.
Internet, it’s me – the asshole of your dreams.
So, are you the asshole of anyone’s dreams?
By Bellwether on Dec 4, 2009
I have never heard that song before but now I love it.
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TJ Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 3:21 pm
You need to delve further into the RBF catalog because that song only scratches the surface of awesomeness.
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By Mikey on Dec 4, 2009
Sweet, that was my comment about the tattoos and i
thank you for sharing. I have 3 but like i do when i decide to do something i go big with it so my whole left arm is covered with the 3.
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TJ Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 3:22 pm
I’ve ended up getting one just about every 2 years since I was 18. While none have especially deep and symbolic meanings, they all do, you know, matter to me. I don’t have any coverage, though, because I don’t have that many ideas.
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By Awlbiste on Dec 4, 2009
I always kind of get annoyed at those people who think that everyone’s tattoos have to have some serious life-defining meaning. Hey, totally cool if it does.
I just think mine is pretty. I’m sorry, jerkholes.
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TJ Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 3:23 pm
I totally respect tattoos mean to be purely decorative as well as those chosen for meaning. LIfe-defining meaning, now, that’s completely different. I’ve got Big Star, and a version of my favorite band’s logo, and DFTBA and such. Yeah, they mean shit, but nothing, you know, important.
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By Adlib on Dec 4, 2009
I think I would have fun or pretty tattoos (as Awlbiste mentioned), but it’s too bad for me that I can’t stand needles. It’s not really the pain, although I don’t know what it feels like, it’s just pain in general isn’t a big deal to me. For some odd reason that I can’t explain even at 29, any time a needle touches me, I turn white, cold sweat, get light-headed, and almost pass out. It’s got to be a subconscious thing because I can’t even control it consciously. At any rate, I think tattoos of pretty much any kind are cool (although I’ve seen some pretty horrific ones).
Anyway, sorry for rambling. I’m just glad it’s Friday!!
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TJ Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 3:24 pm
I’m way more afraid of pain than needles. Every time I’ve sat down to get a tattoo and felt the needles touch me, my immediate thought is always “aw, fuck! That HURTS! Why did I forget how much that HURTS!”
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Mel Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 9:33 pm
But don’t you also get the thought soon after you leave of “damn, I want another one!”
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TJ Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 9:35 pm
Well, I’ve gotten one just about every 2 years since I was 18, so no, that feeling definitely doesn’t come on immediately for me. I know it does for some people.
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Awlbiste Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 3:26 pm
You know, I always just really really wanted at least one. I’ve had mine for 7 years now and I don’t regret it ever.
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Mikey Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 9:14 pm
I am needle-phobic just seeing them freaks me out and iv’e punched a doctor in the face when i was 17 for showing me the needle (and laughing as he walked toward me) when i told him not to. I spent the first 2 hours of my first one not looking at it but after awhile i actually started to enjoy it.
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By Aunt Becky on Dec 4, 2009
I want to get a sleeve but I am a chicken shit because I know someday I will regret the hell out of it. Maybe I won’t but MAN would I want one.
BECAUSE I AM HARDCORE DAMMIT.
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TJ Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 3:27 pm
I have one on my inner left forearm and one that wraps all the way around my right wrist. Now, of course, they are not sleeves, but definitely visible, and I don’t yet regret them. However, I don’t think I would do a sleeve – not because I don’t like them, because you have to have like, artistic skill or vision to come up with something cohesive and attractive and no one has ever described me as artistic. Or cohesive or attractive.
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By Jen_Ann_W on Dec 4, 2009
I can’t WAIT to get my tattoos. I’ve had ideas rumbling around in my head for years but lack the funds…
Also LOVE RBF – If I were to get one of their songs as a tat it would have to be a big pint of beer with a banner that says “Whoo hoo hoo!”
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TJ Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 3:28 pm
I totally just had to go listen to that song, and as soon as the first few notes played, Phil lifted his head and goes, “… Beer?”
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Jen_Ann_W Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 3:59 pm
NICE. It doesn’t matter what kind of mood I’m in, that song always makes me want to go out drinkin.
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By Skraps on Dec 4, 2009
I myself am a huge tattoo fan. Of course I only have 3.
1st – Got a tattoo of an eye with a crown of thorns, no meaning really. Liked the iconography of it. Oh and that was the first date with my my wife.
2nd – Got “The Cure” on my right calf. They are my life defining band. Been listening to them since I was 15. Birthday gift from mom.
3rd – Large Celtic knot made with dragons on my back. 35th birthday from mom.
Some day soon I am going to cover from knee to ankle with a reef scene as I am an avid SCUBA diver. Going to hide a tiny murloc in the art.
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Adlib Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 4:25 pm
Love the murloc idea! :) The rest of the tattoo sounds cool too!
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By Capn John on Dec 4, 2009
Isn’t it funny how the people you least suspect are actually big C&W fans. Then again, who doesn’t love Kenny Chesney :)
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By Coranada on Dec 4, 2009
I’ve wanted my favorite song’s title as a tattoo for almost 20 years now. What I want is “Big Dipper” (from Cracker) but as the constellation not the words. The main reason I still haven’t gotten it is that I can’t quite figure out how I want the tattoo to work other than I don’t want perfect stars. I figure eventually I’ll have the solution or find a tattoo artist who can come up with something cool.
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TJ Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 5:47 pm
A lot a LOT of people go to a tattoo artist and give them their idea and let them draw something up. Except for two of mine (one of which was my first and is admittedly not aesthetically appealing) was drawn up by the artist.
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Coranada Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 7:48 pm
The problem is that where I live tattoo parlors come and go fast and always look shady. None of the ones I’ve checked out have had what I’d call “artists” – just guys with tattoo pens.
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By Chibi Jeebs on Dec 4, 2009
I have four and plans for a fifth (hopefully after Christmas). One “means” something, one is commemorative, and two are just pretty (to me). Number five is going to be a reminder. At some point, I’ll probably have to get a sixth because everything has to balance for me: I’m just weird like that.
And I’m sure SOMEONE dreams about me, the asshole.
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By Swistle on Dec 4, 2009
I want more tattoo talk. I LOVE tattoo talk. I always want to know all about people’s tattoos.
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Awlbiste Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 9:43 pm
http://pics.brizzly.com/MAY.jpg
I have a Japanese-style Om on my left upper shoulderblade which I got when I was 18. I’ve always just thought Oms were really pretty and my tattoo artist showed me what one would look like in a Japanese calligraphy style and I just really liked how it looked.
It also literally means “to sound out loudly” which more or less describes my life, but I wasn’t thinking that deeply at the time, though it really fits now.
I’ve never once regretted it but I’m glad I got it in an easy to cover up area, though I don’t think employers ought to discriminate against those of us with tattoos, many do. I’d like to get more but lack of available funds has thus far prevented me.
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By Calleah on Dec 4, 2009
I have 13.. Pandaren half sleeve on my right arm, Tiger Oni Mask on the inside of my upper left arm, skull and lotus flower on outside of my upper left arm (a cover up for a pinup succubus I had). The Kanji for Sin on my left wrist, the Kanji for Pure Love on my right wrist, and the Kanji for Carnal Lust on my upper forearm. On my back there’s the Undead racial crest between my shoulder blades, a nautical star on each shoulder blade and a tribal heart design a friend made for me on my lower back.
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Calleah Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 10:05 pm
I could totally not know how to count either. 11, not 13. *facepalm*
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By Mel on Dec 4, 2009
I have two tattoos, both which have meaning to me in the way that has to be explained, but they’re simple. The first is a flower with a honeybee on it, the second is the Chinese symbols for sisters/friends that my sister and I got together. And yes, I’m positive that the meaning is what I think it is :)
I got them about 4 years apart, and the last was over 2 years ago, but I still remember the feeling of “I want to do that again!” For me it’s a matter of making the right decision of what and where, and having the cash. I have my next one planned (the word LOVE in a fancy script on the inside of my left wrist, again with multiple meanings), and another partially planned, but I don’t know yet when those will happen.
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By Mel on Dec 4, 2009
Just remembered that I meant to ask – is there really such a thing as chocolate covered potato chips? I’m not sure how I feel about that.
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Mj Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 10:44 pm
Yes – and they are awesome!! Someone I work with makes them and brings them into work. Now that you guys have mentioned it, I think I am going to buy some potato chips and dip them.
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TJ Reply:
December 5th, 2009 at 7:54 pm
Hey, as long as you’re making them… tomorrow IS my birthday… HINT.
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By Mj on Dec 4, 2009
I don’t have a tatt yet – I promised my husband I would get one “when we were married” – planning to get one on my boob after we were done having kids. Haven’t had any kids, and have given up trying, so now I just need to decide what to get – probably a cat, but not sure how she will sit. It is a real big deal for me because I am ultra conservative (dress wise) and don’t even wear jewelry or anything, so I want something I will be happy with no matter what.
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By Bernie on Dec 5, 2009
There was these 2 girls in 11th grade. I’m sure I’m still the asshole of their dreams. I had 2 dates to junior prom.
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By Rhy on Dec 5, 2009
I have 3, which are all of the “this means something to me but not in a deep profound way” variety.
#1 – DNA strand on my right calf just above the ankle – not a wrap, just 3 inches or so. In a nutshell, I have a rareish genetic disorder, so genetics and DNA have always interested me.
#2 – Infinity symbol with IXOYE inside of it on my left arm. Pretty straight forward faith representation.
#3 (The coolest looking one by far) – Loque’nehak. Yes, really. He’s on my left hip. I changed one of his spots to a tiny little Horde emblem, too. Guess how I first found your site, TJ?
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Rhy Reply:
December 5th, 2009 at 12:48 am
….I totally did not put a space in the middle of “straightforward”. That has to be a glitch. Seriously. *headdesk*
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TJ Reply:
December 5th, 2009 at 7:54 pm
Not another one of HIIIIIIIS fans!
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By anatomist on Dec 5, 2009
i have 4 tattoos, but one of them is a full sleeve so i don’t know if that only counts as one. i got my first one when i was 18 and in love with a tattooist and it is now layered under two later tattoos. because as far as i am concerned, no tattooist should ever have been allowed to even speak to me when i was 18. i’ve got two white tattoos which are surprisingly the most commented on, they are unique but they are almost invisible so i don’t know how so many people notice them.
my husband has two sleeves and loads of stories but he never tells them because we both forget that we have them most of the time.
our two year old son just learned to say tattoo and now the only way to get him out of the tub is to give him a fake tattoo to replace the one he just washed off.
speaking of which i have to go shopping for more fake tattoos…
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TJ Reply:
December 5th, 2009 at 7:54 pm
That’s so cute!
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By nonsoccermom on Dec 5, 2009
I have a fleur-de-lis on the inside of my left wrist. I love it, and also love telling people that I got it because it is a historic symbol of royalty. It always makes them wonder if I’m joking.
I actually just have it because I like the way it looks.
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TJ Reply:
December 5th, 2009 at 7:53 pm
That’s how I am about the one on my inner left forearm. It is a band logo, but mostly I just think it’s pretty!
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By Maria on Dec 8, 2009
Both my tattoos have a ton of meaning to me. Both are SUPER popular, typical tattoo designs. So, I’m a douche BOTH WAYS!
http://www.mommymelee.com/2009/09/chicago-ink.html
Heh.
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TJ Reply:
December 8th, 2009 at 3:13 pm
No way, dude.
Firstly, my tattoos totally have meaning to me, too. That’s totally cool. It’;s the people who get crappy tattoos and then try to tell me what each petal of the poorly drawn flower means, like “even though i got this as a drunken 18 year old, this petal represents the day I was potty trained, and this poorly drawn set of boobies? That’s for my grandmother. And the butterfly is my college graduation. And and and…” that makes me fall asleep in my chair.
Secondly, I roll my eyes at all those people who are like “um, why would you want a tattoo that everyone else has?” If a design appeals to you, it does! It has nothing to do with how many other people have or don’t have the same thing. It’s like those people who refuse to like a band if too many people like it. That’s even worse than those weird abstract tattoo people.
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