A problem we have NO real intention of solving.
April 15th, 2010 | by TJ |Internet, I’m going to lay out an issue that Phil and I have. I’m not framing this as a “Settle This” post, because there are some elements of rightness on each side (though there are more, of course, on my side). I’m also not asking for Internet advice. This is for two reasons – one is that Phil and I, being of reasonable levels of intelligence, feel pretty well-equipped to handle any seriously pressing toilet paper issues that we truly feel need a collaborative solution. We’re not the smartest people out there, but I feel like, if forced, we could handle a toilet paper matter. The second reason is that while Internet-given advice is usually sound, we do not occupy the perfect world in which everyone remembers to keep a back up roll in the bathroom at all times, nor are we interested in unnecessarily rearranging the closets and storage of our back up supply of paper goods to suit whatever “DO IT MY WAY!” advice the Internet has come up with, which – let’s be honest – brings us back to reason one. If we cared enough, we would handle it instead of butting heads about it on a semi-regular basis.
So. All disclaimers aside (I’m more right than him, but he might have some small degree of rightness, and also, come on, don’t tell us how to handle our toilet paper issues), here is what we’re dealing with.
First, I’m going to bring back the Naked Alley picture for illustration – I’m reusing and recycling the image because I am very green. Remember that. It’s important. It comes into play later. Heavy-handed foreshadowing. Et cetera.
So, using the above image, let me lay out what we’re working with here. The “A” and “K” of “NAKED ALLEY” indicate the location of the bathroom door. Though you can’t see it, the “E” and “Y” are located approximately where the linen closet/paper goods storage area is located. So, bathroom and closet. Obviously, the closet is where you will find our store of bulk-purchase toilet paper rolls. Inside the bathroom, we keep one roll on the toilet paper roll holder and, in theory, keep a second, spare roll underneath the bathroom sink.
Neither Phil and I are 100% successful at remembering to replace to back up roll of toilet paper under the sink every single time.
So, having moved in with a boy and lived with him for the last year, it has come to my… something – I don’t want to say attention because I don’t want to claim to pay too much attention, so let’s just say that I have become aware that men tend to be on a certain schedule. Phil has certain blocks of time reserved for a certain room in our house at the same time every day. One time before work, one time directly after. I hope that I have not revealed too much of Phil’s personal information but one, I’m given to understand that most men have a similar schedule and two, it’s easier to ask forgiveness later than text him now to ask if I can tell the Internet about when he poops. Also over the last year that we lived together, we have both realized that we go through a lot of toilet paper. Personally, I think that he may be a little heavy handed, whereas he thinks that my lesser quantity by higher overall frequency of toilet paper useage is what causes us to go through it so quickly.
Anyway, since I am asleep when he gets up in the morning, the toilet paper situation is not an issue. At least, not one that I have to deal with. Since I’m asleep. When he leaves the house, the single bathroom is mine for the entirety of the day and I handle all toilet paper needs that may arise during my regular, every 30 to 45 minute trips to the bathroom (I consume a lot of liquid and I have a highly efficient system. Obviously).
Now, you’d think that we have the same problem that most households and sitcoms have dealt with at some point – someone leaves an empty roll sitting there, leaving the second someone high and not dry when the crucial time arrives. Or, apparently worse, someone sets a new roll on the counter or on TOP of the holder instead of taking the three seconds necessary to put it on the holder. But that is not our issue. Ok. Phil has a little issue with that. But whatever, I’m a free spirit and my toilet paper, by extension, can also not be constrained.
But no. Let me see if I can lay out our issue and an understandable way. I use the bathroom three- or four- or seventeen times per day, before Phil comes home from work. He comes home from work and uses the bathroom. Sometimes when he comes home to use the bathroom, he expresses frustration that the toilet paper is gone.
EXCEPT! It is not, in fact, gone. There is plenty enough toilet paper left for me to use the bathroom. Apparently, though, there is not enough left for him to use the bathroom. This frustrates him. Apparently, if at any point during my day, here alone, the roll reaches a level so low as to not contain enough paper for Phil to use, I should replace it.
I disagree. The time at which Phil gets home each day can very anywhere from 3:20pm until 4:40pm, depending on work and necessary errands. That is an EIGHTY MINUTE window. Do you have any idea how often I use the bathroom in the average 80 minute window? No. You don’t have any idea, and nor should you, but let’s just settle on “more than you’d think.”
So say it’s 3:20pm and I have a rough idea that Phil will be home around 4pm. There is not enough toilet paper left for him to use, but certainly enough left for ME to use. Should I replace the roll? NO. I should NOT. Because that is UNENVIRONMENTAL. How am I supposed to anticipate whether or not I will need to use it in those 40 minutes? Phil comes home and ASSUMES I have deliberately and/or lazily left only a small amount of paper specifically to RUIN HIS DAY, but that is not the case at ALL. All evidence indicates that OF COURSE I will have to go sometime in those 40 minutes and EVEN IF I DON’T, he knows DAMN WELL that nothing triggers my bladder faster than watching HIM approach the bathroom with intent to using it, making my previously unrealized need PRESSINGLY URGENT.
In Phil’s mind, toilet paper levels should be kept, AT ALL TIMES, in a state ready to accommodate Phil’s specific needs at any given moment. Even if I have no idea when he’ll be home and GOOD, SOLID REASON to believe that I myself will utilize those last few inches of paper. In my mind, however, he should understand that for the sake of the environment, he should just CHECK before he sits down. And if he DOES remember to check before he sits down, he should UNDERSTAND that there’s no need to be so huffy about my supposed NEGLIGENCE because it’s really just ENVIRONMENTAL CONSCIOUSNESS.
So, how am I mostly right and Phil is also kind of right? Simple. Obviously, it is impossible for me to anticipate how his arrival at home should coordinate with my bathroom useage. Therefore, it is only right that I make the best and most EARTH-FRIENDLY choices with regard to toilet paper. He enjoys a small degree of rightness in that if I remembered to check under the sink to assure the presence of a second roll, he could indeed shave the entire three seconds it takes to travel from the “A” and “K” in “NAKED ALLEY” to the “E” and “Y” in “NAKED ALLEY.” So, yeah. In terms of saving an entire three seconds, Phil is a little bit right as well.
But still. Mostly me.
By Luckedout on Apr 15, 2010
Well, it’s pretty apparent that you consume the majority of the toilet paper supply due to frequent bathroom visits throughout the day. Phil’s usage is minimal due to time away from the home and so his toilet paper usage, although higher than average per visit, is still lower in volume. Therefore, it’s only right that the person who consumes the higher volume with greater frequency throughout the day is more at fault when the roll runs out.
P.S. Why only keep 1 roll under the sink? We keep about 4 under our sink which helps to minimize our 3 second trips from door to closet. Which is good when you have small kids who bring friends over at inopportune times.
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TJ Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 1:22 pm
Right, but we’re not talking about the toilet paper RUNNING OUT. We’re talking about Phil coming home at some undefined time and finding on the roll enough paper for ME, but not enough for HIM. So, for me, it’s not gone – there’s at least one more visit’s worth left. For him, it’s not even a visit’s worth. So I can agree with you IF we were talking about an empty roll. But we’re not!
And as for why only 1 roll under the sink, that’s because that’s how we do it. The rest are in the linen cabinet.
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Luckedout Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 2:40 pm
I don’t know. As a military guy he’s probably used to dealing with never having enough of what he needs when he needs it. You think he could adjust his usage to fit the supply.
I think it would be prudent to adjust your supply of rolls under the sink. It might make this whole argument moot. Of course, maybe I’ve been married long enough that I try really hard to avoid these arguments. They’re kinda funny at first… but in 5 years you’ll think differently.
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TJ Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 2:50 pm
He works in an office, not the bush!
Also, it’s not an argument. You’re actually completely missing the point of the issue, which has nothing to do, really, with where additional rolls are located.
And while I’m sure you didn’t mean it rudely, to suggest that my relationship might suffer if I don’t take your advice about where to keep my toilet paper – something you’re better schooled in than I am since you’ve been married longer – comes across as extremely presumptuous and condescending, to be honest.
And to reiterate – there is NO ISSUE with where the rolls are kept. That’s not the issue at all, really. And the “issue” isn’t even a REAL ISSUE.
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Luckedout Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 4:10 pm
I don’t mean to come across as presumptuous or condescending. My thoughts don’t come across well with a keyboard which is why I like to read blogs instead of writing one myself and why I generally don’t comment. I’m sorry.
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TJ Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 4:14 pm
If you don’t mean it like that, it’s perfectly fine! I know that messages don’t always come across well in text, which is why I said something. The way it sounded to me isn’t the way you meant it, so no big deal. I’d rather have that clear, though, than huff in silence and hold a grudge.
By the way – there isn’t more toilet paper under the sink because I have a crippling fear of wet paper. In case of a pipe leak, I keep the majority of the paper away from the potential water source, so as to minimize the travesty.
And sadly, you can ask Phil, I am not even kidding.
By Diane on Apr 15, 2010
Yeah, I say you’re definitely mostly right here. If it’s a consistent problem for him, why isn’t he checking before he sits down? And if there’s a roll right there under the counter, WHAT IS THE PROBLEM?
Unless “enough” for you is like a single one-ply square. Then he’s 100% right.
I love the things couples battle over. We’ve been together about 10 years, lived together seven, so we’re mostly past this stuff, but I actually MISS IT.
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TJ Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 1:23 pm
Definitely not just one square! Now, I’ll admit that my toilet paper usage, per visit, is quite low, because I have worked out a SYSTEM to accommodate my frequent visits. Sometimes there’s even enough left for TWO visits from me, yet not enough left for one visit from Phil.
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By Superjules on Apr 15, 2010
Oh man, I’m not sure I’m ever going to be able to live with anyone, ever.
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TJ Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 1:24 pm
Oh, psh, this is baby stuff. Like I said yesterday, Phil and I have only had ONE major fight in the entire time we’ve lived together. There’s a whole lot of eye rolling and “what the hell is wrong with you?” issues like this one, but they’re mostly hilarious.
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Superjules Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 1:38 pm
Yeah I didn’t mean that to sound like it was a direct RESULT of your tales of TP disagreements and whatnot, it was more like I had a moment wherein I remembered all my ridiculous roommate tiffs– who takes out the trash… dishes in the sink vs. dishes on the counter vs. dishes in the dishwasher… shower curtain closed (no mold) vs shower curtain open (able to see if there’s a dead body inside) and it just felt overwhelming for a minute. I bet it IS fun and hilarious to live with someone and discover just how many things they do wrong (I mean, uh, differently).
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M.Amanda Reply:
April 16th, 2010 at 9:00 am
Shower curtain open – duh. Dead bodies can wait til you actually are getting in to take a shower. It’s the MONSTERS hiding there you have to know about right away. You know they like to wait until you’re doing business to attack.
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By Awlbiste on Apr 15, 2010
This reminds me of an upcoming problem I am going to have. (Yes we’re going to talk about me in YOUR blog because otherwise I would be trying to give you advice and none of us wants that).
Okay so. Currently, I keep 1 12-pack of toilet paper in the linen closet, which is around the corner from the bathroom. I also keep 1 12-pack (minus what I have used) under the bathroom sink. If I run out of the current roll I can reach under the sink and grab a new roll without even moving. The new house, however, has a pedestal sink. NO ROOM for toilet paper extra rolls in the bathroom.
My current method is AWESOME and works for me AWESOMELY. But now what am I gonna do?
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Lindsay Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 1:25 pm
We have a decorative type vase thing that I store extra in right next to the toilet. Also, they have things that hang from the toilet to store extra in as well (you MUST shut the lid before flushing then though, to keep it clean).
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TJ Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 1:25 pm
Are you going to live alone? If so, and you’re the type that likes accessible toilet paper, maybe an artful stack!
OR? They have toilet paper holders than stand next to the toilet that hold not only the current roll, but several back up rolls. They also sell more discreet, canister-like ones as well.
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stacey Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 2:44 pm
In my half bathroom with a pedestal sink, I keep a couple of extra rolls in a basket on the floor under the sink, along with some cleaning supplies.
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Jessi Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 7:07 pm
I used to have an onion basket in my bathroom, which perfectly held four rolls. It curved over the top so that it was easy for guests to see that it was there if they needed it, but kind discreet at the same time. I totally dug it.
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By Jade on Apr 15, 2010
If he’s such a process and schedule person, why can’t he add “Check the TP before I pull the pants down” to his process? I mean, HE’S the one with the problem, HE should find a solution. *ahem*
Btw, I’m a chronic “throw the roll on top of the empty roll or back of the toilet” person. Drives my husband up the wall. ;) Partly why I do it.
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TJ Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 1:33 pm
The thing is, he DOES check. And rather than being grateful that he was spared from being stuck there with a limited supply, he huffs about having to grab another roll! A full three second process!
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Jade Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 1:37 pm
Well, I’m of the mindset that everyone has to have SOMETHING they like to huff about. I love to huff about when the hubs sorts laundry but he doesn’t gather the pile-o-laundry I have in the master bathroom. He loves to huff about my leaving said pile in the bathroom in the first place.
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By Chibi Jeebs on Apr 15, 2010
I’m the déclassé asshole who has over-the-toilet racks in both bathrooms so I can stack as much toilet paper on it as I can fit. I hate going to someone’s house and there being NOT ENOUGH toilet paper and none readily evident (for as nosy as I am, I don’t snoop through medicine chests: looking in cupboards for TP – even in a NOT ENOUGH situation – gives me the heebs), so I hang mine out for all the world to see.
We can fit 16 rolls of TP on the racks (2 layers of 2 rows of 4). I fill from the front of the top layer, moving to the back, before starting on the lower level. Chebbar likes to mess with my OCD tendencies by REARRANGING the TP so it’s 2 layers of 4 at the back of the rack. Then he giggles (like the asshole HE is) when my head explodes all over said TP.
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TJ Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 1:34 pm
We do make sure there is a roll and a spare for guests. When we had house guests, we not only made sure there was a roll and a spare, but showed them where ALL the toilet paper was kept as well. So that everyone could be secure in their activities and available supply.
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By Turtlechelle on Apr 15, 2010
We keep one spare roll under the sink, too, for space reasons. We call it the “a-hole roll” because it’s there in case some a-hole forgets to replace the toilet paper. It’s a great memory device, because you always remember not to be an a-hole when the roll needs switching.
Not that you’re the a-hole here. I think Phil bears at least some of the responsibility for starting into an endeavor like that without securing his supplies first.
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TJ Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 2:20 pm
Ha. A-hole roll. I like that.
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By Reddirt on Apr 15, 2010
My wife and I live in an every man/woman for themselves house.
We have the understanding that we are both responsible for our own bowel related welfare and hygene.
At least for another 30 years. After that, all bets are off.
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By DD on Apr 15, 2010
Hubby and I have had similar discussions. I think guys, in general, don’t have any real concept of our levels of use. If there’s 3 or 4 revolutions of paper left on the roll, I’m good for one of the frequent trips. But that would be a catastrophe of epic proportions for the hubster. Of course, if he’s in the master bath, then the linen closet holding all back-up rolls is right next to the toilet so he can just reach left instead of right.
I used to get annoyed that he would leave the “girl sized” remnant on the holder, pull a new roll out and leave it on the counter. But then I realized that was MY issue, so now I just deal with it. Sometimes I even go ahead a load a new one up and stash the remnant in the closet to use on my next visit.
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TJ Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 2:21 pm
See, you get it – it’s not that I’m leaving an empty roll sitting there! There’s usable paper!
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By Kirsten on Apr 15, 2010
It’s clear to me that the issue isn’t how much tp is on the roll for Phil’s evening visit, but that he just uses too damn much of it. Since it’s unlikely that you’re psychic, there’s no reason to assign blame to you for not knowing exactly when to replace a roll. Also, the right time to replace a roll is when it is entirely used up.
If I had to hear about this in my house, I’d totaly just go buy a whole new TP holder for his majesty and tell him he’s responsible for his very own dispenser.
But, yeah, you’re more than mostly right.
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Faith Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 2:08 pm
Kirsten – I’d totally go for the separate TP holders. My hubby has a thing about cardboard… he can’t stand the texture of it and refuses to hold the soda holders from fast food places. Thus, he has an aversion to rolling out the TP to the last square… he might touch the icky cardboard and die. So often, he throws away the last little bit and refills from a plastic drawer we have next to the toilet. When that is empty, he mostly remembers to tell me so I can fill it up. Because after 5 years of living in the house we built, he still has no idea where I keep the 25 rolls of toilet paper!!
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DDStL Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 4:23 pm
Off topic, but OMG! Your hubby may just have a worse phobia than mine. I mean, cardboard is EVERYWHERE! Mine is phobic about tape and other sticky things (stickers, dried jelly on counters or jars, etc.). He doesn’t like the sound of tape being pulled off of anything, which I discovered our first Christmas together when I pulled a bow off of a package and stuck it to his shirt. I thought he was going to have a stroke.
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Kirsten Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 5:48 pm
Really? Cardboard? That’s a little endearing in an oddball kinda way! And yes, the “We’ve lived here FOR HOW LONG and you still can’t remember where the back up toilet paper is?” question has come up in my house more than once, but not more than the “You can get the glass to the counter directly above the dishwasher, but opening the door and putting the glass INSIDE is too much trouble for you?” question.
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By Carrie on Apr 15, 2010
We’ve worked it out mostly so that whoever uses it up replaces it, and we keep the whole package within reach of the toilet so there’s no wandering through the house to get a new one. But for a very long time I was the one getting huffed at because I would get the new roll out and leave it on the counter instead of taking three seconds to take off the empty roll and put the new one on the little holder thing. It’s still right next to the toilet, what’s the big deal???
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TJ Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 2:22 pm
Well, his issue isn’t that I’m using it up. It’s that when he comes home, sometimes, there isn’t ENOUGH paper, yet I haven’t replaced the roll. Of course I haven’t! It’s not gone! I could pee at least once or twice more before it would be gone!
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Carrie Reply:
April 16th, 2010 at 3:07 am
Ahh, right, right. We’re both more “make do” people. If there’s only four squares left, I’ll make do with that just the one time, and go grab a new roll after. Left to my own devices, I generally use more during one visit than he deems necessary. Sometimes I get picked on for that. But right now he’s distracted because the kids keep filling up the whole toilet with paper when they use it, so I’m off the hook for a bit!
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By Dinsdale on Apr 15, 2010
Well, we leave spare rolls in baskets by the toilet, because we’re classy like that. But yeah, if Phil checks, it’s not a big deal. If he, say, always FORGOT to check, and you KNEW he forgot but just didn’t bother to replace it, THEN he might have a point. As it is, no one’s really inconvenienced.
And because this blew my mind when I realized it was even a question: Sit or stand to wipe?
I should forewarn you, you and Phil will either be in total agreement, or kind of horrified and disgusted that the other person could be SO WRONG.
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TJ Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 2:20 pm
See, but it’s not an issue of it running out and me not replacing it. It’s an issue of me leaving ENOUGH FOR ME, but NOT enough for him. Like I was supposed to magically anticipate he’d be the next one to use the bathroom when experience I shown I am WAY more likely to be the one using it at ALL times!
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By Kestrel on Apr 15, 2010
For years, my wife was convinced our three sons purposefully left only 2 squares of paper on the roll, so she’d change it instead of one of them.
I tried to tell her once that s…stuff happens; she wasn’t amused.
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By Annabelle on Apr 15, 2010
You are totally right. No question! GO GREEN! I am positively TWITCHY thinking about changing a roll when there is still TP left. GAH.
And I do feel your pain. While we have no TP issues, I’ve lived with Wife for almost four years now and I still have to re-arrange the dishwasher when she puts things in the wrong place. I will admit it is possible I have a few of my own control issues at play there.
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By Endy on Apr 15, 2010
Jane, I have one word for you: Bidet! I’m serious. To hell with the toilet paper issue. Get a bidet attachment for your toilet and use 1/3 less tp to just dry rather than wipe. I did this a couple of years ago. Happy butt!! :)
He’s the model like the one I got (I couldn’t find my exact one).
http://www.samsclub.com/shopping/navigate.do?dest=5&item=409373&pid=_Froogle&ci_src=14110944&ci_sku=429635
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Khronos Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 4:37 pm
Ever since I was a kid, I’ve been frightened of bidets. I know I should really be frightened MORE of the toilet itself, since it sucks stuff in instead of putting stuff out, but I dunno if I could bring myself to use one. I’m no good at being French, apparently.
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Endy Reply:
April 16th, 2010 at 5:57 am
Haha! Well..I will tell this story about my first time using this thing…I installed it and checked it and observed how it was going to work..you know…on my butt. I little while later I got my chance to use it…well…I’ll warn you, make sure you turn the water on S-L-O-W-L-Y and that you don’t use too much pressure. I thought I was going to give myself an enema! Haha…I sat there doubled over laughing hysterically. But Really, it’s nothing to be afraid of. They work great and you really feel quite clean and fresh each time. You can get the ones that heat the water, but I never found that to be an issue, the cold water is fine.
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By Katie on Apr 15, 2010
I have to agree with Jade. Essentially what we have here is a revision of the “If you give a shit, it’s your job” rule. In this instance (forgive the crudeness): if you take a shit, it’s your job. So the concept of sufficient paper goods is a nonissue; his routine can change to grabbing a roll of toilet paper on the way to the bathroom either in the morning or evening. That way, if nothing else, he knows that there is an extra roll just waiting for him when he gets home.
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By Backlaveck on Apr 15, 2010
In our old house I had a nice basket on the back of the toilet that was always stocked with at least 5 rolls of tp, we still somehow had a few “omg no tp” moments but for the most part it was good.
Our current home has a wall right beside the toilet. Its one of those where the potty is in its own little area. Well one day the hubby throws a TpPhil. (Im calling it that because today is Phils moment in the potty sun, sorry Phil) Anyhow, he gets all huffy because the tp is under the sink around the corner. I can understand the frustration of duck walking over to get some but geez dont have a fit over it.
So while he was at work I went and bought a wall mounted towel rack. You know just the simple wooden bars that you hang your towel from. I removed our tp roll holder and replaced it with the towel rack and slid the tp rolls on that bad boy. Like a serious “pimp my tp” moment. Six yes SIX rolls at a time.
Tp problem solved yes? No. No he can not get it through his head to start from one end of the rack and work to the other. He starts in the middle which means when he finishes one I have to take of 2-3 to replace the empty one because heaven will strike me dead if I leave one empty. Its just not right!!
There is no winning the bathroom wars. Ever.
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By Jen_Ann_W on Apr 15, 2010
Until you brought it up, I never thought about the amount of TP Brian uses compared to me. All I know is, if I buy the wrong brand? All hell breaks lose. It HAS to be Charmin Ultra Soft. Period.
I thought of a sneaky way to break Phil’s habit of using so much TP, but you’re not looking for ass-vice on this so I’ll save it. :-)
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By Khronos on Apr 15, 2010
I want to know how to get in on this “schedule” action Phil has; it would make my life much more convenient and predictable.
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By Kirsten on Apr 15, 2010
Teej, I can call you Teej, right?
Just out of curiosity, is this also a thing on the weekends when he’s not at work all day? Do you have to psychic-ize his schedule then and put a fresh roll on before his afternoon/evening visit?
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By Delicia on Apr 15, 2010
In my opinion, it’s Survival of the Shittist.. Phil has no right to complain about the minimum quantity of toilet paper because obviously that is exactly the correct amount needed and he just uses too much.
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By Delicia on Apr 15, 2010
Oh, and seriously I used to keep a bunch of extra toilet paper under our sink, and then a mouse literally CHEWED A HOLE in the back wall in the back of the sink cabinet, and then peed and chewed on and pooped all over all those beautiful pristine rolls of toilet paper. Which then had to be thrown out. I’m surprised I don’t have little plastic seal-able totes for everything in my now-paranoia.
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By Fyurae on Apr 15, 2010
His and her TP holders? How awesome would that be??? Then you could buy flower printed toilet paper (or whatever kicks your chicken) and buy him something with a manly motif (dumptrucks maybe?)
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Fyurae Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 7:00 pm
Oh, I have my own TP compliant as well. My home has always been a ‘cheapest available’ toiletpaper household. Therefore, whenever I go to some hoity-toity house where their butts are too good for the Scott’s One-Ply I end up with a FISTFULL of toilet paper that I have to rip up and put the rest back.
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Awlbiste Reply:
April 15th, 2010 at 7:54 pm
Scott’s One-Ply buddy! I find I use a lot less TP with the Scott’s than with the fancy shit (ha!). Also it flushes better in my old house plumbing.
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By ysabelkid on Apr 16, 2010
First, I am so glad that this non-issue post was not about “damn guys can’t ever replace toilet paper” because really, the “you know what mena re like” thing gets old after a while. Trust you, TJ, to make a post about toilet paper so hilarious without turning it into a Mars/Venus debacle.
Second, WHO replaces a roll when there is still paper left on it? No one in their right minds, that’s who! What a waste.
I wish we had a cupboard under the sink where we could store extra rolls; that’s on my list of Things To Make during our household renovations this year. And I plan on building in shelves on the side to stack magazines for the loobrary look. (Currently, MadCat and I just bring in an extra roll and put it on the windowsill when we deem it necessary.)
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ysabelkid Reply:
April 16th, 2010 at 10:44 am
And also, I cannot type. “… what men are like”, I meant.
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By Nichole on Apr 16, 2010
Haha. My fiance and I have had this argument before. He thought that if there was a small amount left on the roll than I should just replace it to accommodate him. Well, no, there is enough left for me…get your own damn TP!
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By HokieJayBee on Apr 16, 2010
oh man. i type this with quivering fearful fingers for the backlash! cap’n john warned you about me!
wait, was i the last of the old commenting rules or the first of the new commenting rules?!?!?! :P
as for current issue, and are you truly earthy?
http://www.sanicare.com/SearchResults.asp?Cat=19
it’s rinse-butt time!
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By M.Amanda on Apr 16, 2010
You are right. I go through the same arguments with my husband. Although he tries to get me to concede to his point by leaving just enough to cover the cardboard, which is TWO F-ING SQUARES, and saying that it’s enough for him if he has to pee, it is not the same thing. I maintain that I AM RIGHT. Therefore, you are right, also.
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By Bre on Apr 16, 2010
In my house, those specific times of day are referred to as “downloading”. You’re welcome, you will never download a file of the internet the same again. :) Oh and TMI, I’m fully aware.
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By Bre on Apr 16, 2010
In my house, those specific times of day are referred to as “downloading”. You’re welcome, you will never download a file of the internet the same again. :) Oh and TMI (on my part), I’m fully aware.
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By JEC on Apr 16, 2010
As an engineer, I’m gonna say this should be a one fault tolerant system. If you forget to check that the spare roll is there, but Phil remembers to make sure he’s gonna have enough to get the job done, it’s fine. If he doesn’t do that but you’ve remembered to check that there’s a spare roll, it’s also fine. One fault is fine. It’s when you both neglect your duties and have two faults that the system fails! You already admit you’re both right…now act accordingly (joking, I know you’re not looking for instructions from the internet)!
Of course, you could always just adopt the philosophy of TPE (toilet paper emergency), whereby you keep a ridiculous amount of toilet paper at all times. A friend’s ex-girlfriend was a practicioner, the cabinet under their sink literally had like 20 rolls of paper under it.
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