Temerity Jane

Please forward my mail to the Ramparts

I know WoW posts don’t make sense to most of my readers. I promise to post something comprehensible later today.

As you might know, Internet, I’ve never been a huge fan of a lot of the changes that have been made to WoW – the dumbing down of the game has been going on forever. You know, like how quest items didn’t used to sparkle, you certainly couldn’t ride your mount in the water, you don’t have to do ANYTHING for your Dreadsteed anymore… PHIL.

Phil often tries to talk to me about the different things that have happened in each patch, but either I don’t care because I play so sporadically, or I shriek over him because something has been changed so much as to make it criminally stupid. Like the new quest helper thing? Come on!

Of course, Phil did point out that I use an add on that essentially does the same thing, but shut up, people who agree with Phil, because that’s completely different. It is. I certainly didn’t use it, or any add ons, on my first character – not for a long while. I at least learned the mechanics of the game and how to find non-sparkling quest items before I started using add ons at all.

But anyway, one thing I guess I can get behind is the new cross server looking for group tool. I’m playing a priest on a server where I don’t know anyone, unguilded. Around level 55, seeing that Phil was getting some groups through the new tool, I decided to give it a try. The reason I wanted to give it a try was specifically because of the cross server thing – I’ve never ever healed before (I’ve leveled some healers, but have pretty much never done instances as I leveled – there’s a lot of them out there, at all levels, that I’ve never even seen, even after playing the game for a skrillion years).

Anyway, I’d never healed before, so I figured if I sucked at it, everyone else would be from another server and I’d never have to see them, you know, at the bank in Org or something, and be all embarassed at my suckitude. The first random I was sent to was old school BRD, and I actually got really lucky with the tank, who happened to be from my server. He was super easy to heal, and my first attempt at healing went so well that when he asked if I wanted to group up and queue up again, I said sure. I think he and I ended up doing BRD 3 or 4 times.

The next day or so, I had some not-so-good luck with the group finder, and leveled up to 60 in the process. Once I got out to Outland last night – which, by the way? AWFUL. Because on Saturday night, Headmaster’s Charge dropped in a group I was in for the first time in my life. Ok, so that may not sound like such a big deal now, but way back in super super old WoW, I seriously waited my entire life for that to drop. Not one time did I ever see it. Yet, on Saturday night, it finally did. And I was the only one who could use it. 24 hours later, I get to Outland and replace it. I had Headmaster’s Charge for 24 goddamn hours.

Anyway! When I stepped foot in Outland, that tank grabbed me again and asked if I wanted to queue up – so we did. We ended up in Ramparts and ran it. We queued up together and ran it again and ended up with a great group, and ran it once more with them. We lost one from that group, grabbed a random and ran again. Lost two, grabbed two and ran again. Dropped one and ran again. One of our members told us it takes 15 minutes or so to get a group as DPS, but when we queue up as tank and healer, we pretty much have a group instantly. I am pretty sure I live in Ramparts now

I’ve had no complaints with my healing at all, and of course it got easier and easier – both because I was getting more and more familiar with an instance I haven’t done in years and because on a couple of the runs, nothing but cloth dropped. By the third or fourth time through, I was actually able to look up and see what the instance looked like, rather than keep my eyes glued to the green bars (thank you to whoever suggested the VuhDo add on, by the way – love it).

This priest may actually be the first toon I level to 80, I’ve been enjoying healing so much. I definitely credit the new looking for group system with it if I do end up making it that far with this one (I have a habit of stopping at 70 and rolling something new). Once I get to 80, I’m not sure what I’ll do – possibly look for a guild I guess, and with all of the changes, I don’t have to limit that to my server or even my faction. As I learned from the venerable Ted and Marshall, however, that sounds like a decision that Future TJ would be happy to handle for me.

If you want to play with me, all you have to do is decipher the very complex clues in the image above and then continually join and leave random dungeons until I appear in yours. A second option is to roll on Zangarmarsh and level to 61 to catch up with me, before I hit 62. I recommend the first option, as the second is tedious and somewhat impossible. See you in Ramparts (because that’s where I live now).

Posted in Yeah, I play WoW | 20 Comments »

Two weeks off

What two weeks of Thanksgiving vacation time looks like to someone in the military:

Aside from Thanksgiving travel, and the fact that we got all of our Christmas shopping (except for the Christmas beer) done yesterday, we have spent the majority of Phil’s vacation time playing WoW together for the first time in a long time.

Well, playing in the same room. I think we have two or three sets of toons we rolled to play together that never seem to make it past the mid-teens. This is mostly his fault, since he’s always all “Oh, I’m just going to go level some PROFESSIONS, we’re still playing TOGETHER” and I’m all “Fuck professions!” and our play styles totally don’t mesh, because come on, seriously, fuck professions.

Anyway, he hit 80 on Drenden yesterday (there was appropriate fanfare, I threw confetti, which was actually mild hot sauce packets from Taco Bell, but we sit across the room from each other, and actual shredded paper wouldn’t have made it all the way across, and I suppose I could have stood up and walked over but COME ON), and I’ve been playing a priest on Zangarmarsh (where I started playing  before I realized that it’s the server where WoW Insider has their guild, and briefly considered starting over, that’s how much I hate them).

Phil’s play time is usually pretty normal, while mine goes something like this:

“Oh! A rare elite!”
“Hey, a rare elite!”
“Oh look, another rare elite!”

I’m like a magnet for those things. And last night, in a five minute span, I said “Hey, I found a blue in this chest. Oh, look, a rare elite! Hey, this ghost just dropped a purple!”

I was totally like the King of WoW last night.

Anyway, I was in a guild for a little bit, but I had to leave. I didn’t mind the fact that they claimed to be a social, casual guild, but no one ever talked except when they were getting ready to raid. In a hardcore fashion.

And I didn’t mind that they continually proclaimed things to be “gay,” though the fact that most of them possessed literally no other way to express their displeasure was a bit disturbing.

What I could not forgive, however, was the continual use of text speak and the fact that six people IN A ROW messed up the appropriate usage of there, their and they’re.

/GQUIT.

I have since been invited to join another guild, which sounded great, until I found out that their guild name was in all lowercase. COME ON. I cannot take you seriously as a group of people playing a video game as dead people, walking cows and tusk-faces taking on mythical challenges in a fantasy world when you can’t even capitalize appropriately.

Anyway, with his accomplishment of hitting level 80, Phil owns the only level 80 in our household, between both accounts. When Wrath came out, we each had a level 70 lock. He bought Wrath for both of us on release day and… we both rolled hunters. I leveled that hunter to 70 and he got his pretty high as well, and then I took a break from the game for a bit. I played various lowbie alts on and off, and I’ve now started that priest, which is level 45.

He made an entirely new lock on Drenden a few weeks ago, and that is the one he leveled to 80. We both have level 70 locks, and I have a level 70 hunter, who have never seen even one little inch of the expansion. I haven’t played Wrath at all. I parked my 70 lock in Northrend or whatever it’s called the day I installed the expansion and haven’t logged in to her since. I don’t even have an explanation for myself.

After Phil goes back to work next week, I’ll probably drift away from WoW again. I had moved my lock to play with him, and didn’t really have the social aspect of the game anymore, and in my time away on other servers and my long WoW break, my old guild on Drenden has gotten a lot of new players and lost some familiar ones, so it doesn’t quite feel the same anymore. Without Phil playing in the same room and a guild that suits my ridiculously picky grammatical and capitalization needs, I don’t think I will ever have the motivation to make it to 80.

Solution: Phil quits the military to play WoW all day. Turns into mountain man, as illustrated above.

I become deeply resentful of his mountainy face, as his beard chaps my delicate skin. I bottle up my resentment so as not to seem shallow, but become progressively more distant as I level toon after toon to 80.

I begin to sarcastically refer to Phil as “Dr. Beardface” behind his back, correcting myself immediately by saying “That’s Beard FAH SAY,” because that’s hysterical. He catches me making fun of him in such a manner over vent one day and I try to cover by saying I was talking about one of my many, many level 80s. He doesn’t buy it and gathers his favorite belongings into a handkerchief which he ties to a stick, and takes off dramatically with the dog, trudging down the road with his thumb out.

He doesn’t get far, because we live in a low-traffic subdivision, and he stupidly chose dramatic over taking his perfectly good SUV. I lose my motivation to play shortly after he leaves, and all of my leveling work is for nothing. Plus I no longer have a dog.

Anyway, that’s pretty much the only scenario I can think of in which I’d get a toon to level 80, and since it ends up with me not having a dog, I’m not really into it. But if you play on Zangarmarsh, do feel free to say hi. I’m the not-level-80 horde priest. See you there!

Posted in Yeah, I play WoW | 29 Comments »

December 1, WoW stuff

“Did you hit 80 yet?”

“Nope, I’ve been holding off.”

“What, are there not enough people online yet?”

“Yep.”

“So… you’re holding off on hitting 80 until there are more guild members online.”

“I’m not going to deny it, I want the fanfare.”

“HA!”

“It’s a special thing!”

Posted in TJ + Phil, Yeah, I play WoW | 14 Comments »

Ow, my feeling.

So I was thinking about this old Hallmark commercial the other day, where this woman watches out the window as the old lady across the street walks to her mail box every day, opens it, sees that it’s empty and does the sad Charlie Brown walk back into her house, so she gets a brilliant idea and writes a Hallmark card and has he daughter run over and put it in the mailbox, and then a couple of days later the daughter comes running in with a jar of jam or something from the old lady and says it’s from the old lady and “I think she was crying!”

That commercial, COMMERCIAL, makes me so unbearably sad every time I think about it because it makes me think of people who spend Christmas alone, which I mostly have to totally avoid thinking about so as to keep from throwing myself out the window in despair.

Also? Ok, even if you don’t play WoW, you might get this one, so I’m going to explain it for those of you who don’t play WoW, instead of assuming you know what I’m talking about.

One time, I was chatting with my guild and someone told this story as it was happening: Apparently, a couple of higher level characters took a very new player – a level 4 or 5 or so, out to Redridge, where he shouldn’t be until a much higher level because everything there will kill him, over and over and over. So these people take him out to Redridge and leave him there, as a joke, and it turned out he was only like, 8 years old, and didn’t even know how to use his hearthstone yet to take him back to his starting location, so he thought he was stuck there forever and that the game was totally over for him, all because he trusted these two d-bags to take him somewhere fun.

When I think about that poor little kid thinking that he had already totally lost the game of WoW and there was nothing he could do about it, I want to hole up in my room and read Sylvia Plath for days on end. Isn’t it just the most terrible, saddest thing you’ve ever heard?

Internet, I cannot be the only person so deeply affected by television commercials and children I don’t know. It’s impossible that I be the only person affected, because we all know I only have one feeling and it’s usually occupied with be angry at something, so if something is sad enough that I notice, then the whole world must be miserably depressed on a regular basis.

So, Internet, what things that do not in any way involve yourself make you avoid heights in order to keep from throwing yourself off in despair?

Posted in daily BS, Yeah, I play WoW | 19 Comments »

Oh how the world has changed

So Phil and I have both recently picked up WoW again. He’d played more recently than I have, and kept up with patch notes and such, so he was on the receiving end of a lot of comments like “WHY is someone MOUNTED in the WATER?” which is apparently how things are now.

Anyway, it got me thinking about all the different things that changed since the last time I played WoW, plus all the things that changed DURING the time I was playing WoW.

• First of all, I rolled a new lock and immediately put my first 5 points in improved Corruption, because you need instant Corruption, right? Except, I hadn’t even noticed, it was ALREADY instant. CORRUPTION USED TO HAVE A CAST TIME, PEOPLE.
• When I first started playing WoW, warlocks didn’t have shard bags. I don’t have one on that toon now. It’s obnoxious.
• You could only mail ONE THING AT A TIME.
• Did you know that in order to fly anywhere, you had to manually fly from point to point? You couldn’t just choose a destination and automatically go through all the legs of the journey. If you AFK’d while flying, you’d come back and be standing at a flight point only halfway there!
• I saw a level 56 on a Dreadsteed. Something deep inside of me died.
• PHIL HAS A DREADSTEED AND DID NOT GO TO DIRE MAUL TO OBTAIN IT.
• Quest items did not SPARKLE like a fucking VEGETARIAN VAMPIRE IN THE SUN.
• There were no mounts at 20 or whatever is now, and only ONE flight point in STV. Yeah, that’s right. You had to run the ENTIRE length of STV over and over and over. No mount! No flying from top to bottom!
• The quest log only held some small ridiculous amount of quests.
• Drain Soul only worked if the target died while you were using drain soul. Now I’m pulling 3 shards off a single mob? WTF? I DON’T WANT THREE SHARDS, I DON’T EVEN HAVE A SOUL BAG.
• You used to have to be attuned to things, through a laborious process, to get to go to certain dungeons.
• You couldn’t do heroic instances unless you have exhalted or something. That changed while I was still playing to just honored, I think, or else I never would have seen a single heroic.
• WTF is a glyph, people? WTF IS A GLYPH?

Anyway, I am sure if you have been playing WoW for any length of time, you can come up with more. For people who have been playing longer than I have (4 years), I am sure you’ve got some good ones, too.

I feel like a cranky old man in the game these days.

“In MY day, we hald to WALK through STV! Uphill! BOTH WAYS! And when I took a flight or got on my mount? My summoned demon went away! AND I DIDN’T GET THE SHARD BACK. AND? When you sac’d your Voidwalker? HE DIED. DIED! He DIED so you could have that puny little bubble! YOU KIDS THESE DAYS DON’T KNOW HOW GOOD YOU HAVE IT!”

Posted in Yeah, I play WoW | 46 Comments »

Opening up my head door

So, for reasons I don’t really feel like going into in a public area, it’s been a pretty stressful few weeks. Things were kind of tough here and there for a bit, and then Phil and I went on a little vacation out to Anaheim (we were originally going to Blizzcon, but sold the tickets and just had a nice vacation out there, staying with his aunt) and I feel a bit better now. Getting things back under control, at least. But over the few weeks that it’s been a little quiet around here, I’ve thought of some things I’d like to tell you about.

• First of all, I was thinking today that I don’t really know enough people with an appreciation for Queen. I mean, everyone likes Queen, right? We Will Rock You, We Are the Champions, etc. But I’d like to hear from some people who really like Queen and appreciate some of the less famous songs. There’s some really great stuff out there. What is your favorite under appreciated Queen song?
• Secondly, I’ve got to say, this doesn’t even really make sense, but when I moved out here, I know I was leaving pretty much everything and everyone I know, and it was a bummer, but it hasn’t been bad. I love being out here with Phil and while I don’t have any real feelings one way or another on Arizona, I’d not mind being anywhere that he is. Since the engagement, however, it’s been a bit more difficult. Not that I need to be the center of attention or care to be, but when something major like that happens, you really realize that there’s no one here, at all. That’s been kind of a downer lately.
• Thirdly, Ratshag left a diet soda in our car for me. I was totally going to sell it for a million dollars, but when we were going out yesterday, Phil, knowing that I don’t go anywhere without a diet soda, handed it to me from the fridge. And I drank it. There goes our future riches.
• Fourthly, I really love webseries type shows. There’s Dr Horrible, of course, and I still think that LonelyGirl15 was one of the most creative and awesome and ambitious projects that has been done to date in terms of the webseries genre. Recently, and you can laugh if you want, I watched all of Sorority Forever, another webseries that had Jessica Rose (aka LonelyGirl15) in it, and I really enjoyed it. If there are any webseries type shows you watch, I would love to hear about them, especially if they’re along the lines of LG15 or Sorority Forever – kind of a mystery that unfolds as it goes along.
• Fifthly, I’ve mentioned here in the past that I used to lead a Molten Core raid some years ago, and over the weekend, I got a chance to meet the main tank from that raid. He was in CA for Blizzcon, all the way from New Zealand. Phil and I had just been at Disney all day and were so exhausted, but I am very happy we didn’t pass up the chance to hang out with him for a bit, it was awesome.
• Sixthly, someone recently commented and asked about my WoW playing. Phil and I hadn’t played at all in a very long time, and Phil even cancelled his account. Of course, as soon as it was cancelled, he got interested again. I’ve started playing again, too, but neither of us has touched our higher level characters. We have all our high toons over on Silvermoon, but we don’t have a guild over there, and I think I’ve realized that in order for the game to really hold any interest for me, I need a fun guild to hang around and chat with. So we’re trying to find a place with fun, friendly people who are willing to take on a couple of lowbies who really just like the social aspect and will not likely be raiding any time in the near future.
• Seventhly, I’m leaving for Pennsylvania on Friday, to stay out there for 2 weeks. I haven’t seen my family since Februrary and I’m really excited to go somewhere where everything is familiar. I’m going out there to start the wedding planning process, though, so it might be a bit more stressful than I’d otherwise like.
• Eighthly, did you know that I burn incense all day, every day, everywhere? Even in the bathroom or outside. I burned incense pretty frequently at my home in Maryland and I’ve realized that doing it here and walking into rooms that actually smell like home has done a LOT for making me feel more comfortable.
• Ninethly, Phil and I went to the used bookstore last night and bought a bunch of stuff. I picked up a kid’s book I remember terrifying me years ago, and I’m really enjoying reading it again. There are a lot of books I read as a kid that I’d like to collect all over again. I remember getting so much more satisfaction and enjoyment out of books back then. Not that I don’t like books now, but they felt so much more epic and special. Stuff like Betty Ren Wright and Mary Downing Hahn and the hardcover Nancy Drew books and just tons of stuff. I also picked up the rest of the Alvin Maker series by Orson Scott Card – I read the first one years ago. I also go a bunch of George R. R. Martin as well. I’ve been reading a lot of chick lit lately and I really just wanted to find some stuff that was seriously epic and immersive.
• Tenthly, YOU WILL NEVER BELIEVE WHO WAS STANDING MERE FEET AWAY FROM ME IN THE LINE TO PICK UP BLIZZCON TICKETS AND I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW IT WAS HIM SO I DIDN’T GET TO UNLEASH MY FURY.

Posted in daily BS, I think, Yeah, I play WoW | 40 Comments »

And then my hair went completely gray.

Hey Internet,

What’s up? Long time no talk. The internet works both ways, you know, guys. Frankly, I’m a little hurt. I mean, you don’t call, you don’t write, you don’t send me flowers any more. I thought to myself, “You know, self, why don’t you just sit back and let the Internet come to you for a couple days?”

And you know what?

IT DIDN’T.

Anyway, I forgive you. It’s no big, really. Please, don’t get up. Let me tell you what’s been going on around here, in generic and informational bullet point format.

• Work: I’m busy!
• Arizona: It’s hot!
• Brinkley: Brinkley was a little sick last week, sort of… I don’t know? It was up and down. Every time we’d start to be genuinely concerned… he was fine. I can tell you, though, he was having fresh cooked rice while I was eating from the drive through, so he didn’t really suffer that much.
• Phil: I’ve got a couple of new things I like to do to annoy hm. Is that perverse? I mean, that I deliberately look for little things that will drive him nuts? Does everyone do that? I don’t, you know, kick him and then run away*, but for example, two recent tactics: I use the bathroom before him at night and squeeze the toothpaste from the middle and wait for him to notice it. Or I don’t straighten out the blankets when I get in bed and instead pull the sheet and duvet over me upside down, with the sheet on top. Drives him NUTS and it’s HILARIOUS.
• My sister: I have yet to take revenge.
• Wedding plans: Oh god, I swore I wouldn’t make this a wedding planning blog but OH MY GOD YOU GUYS OH MY GOD. I need a whole separate set of bullet points.

Secondary set of bullet points:

• I had to bribe my sister to be the Maid of Awesome.
• I don’t know what world my mother lives in, but an invitation list of 130 people and expanding is NOT A SMALL WEDDING.
• EVERYONE has objected to EVERYTHING. My sister had to be bribed to be the Maid of Awesome. My mother doesn’t approve of the fact that I am not asking a childhood friend to be an attendant. My cousin thinks my flower girl of choice will be too old. My sister HATES the idea of a March or April of 2011 wedding. My mother’s answer to me saying anything she doesn’t really care for is “You have plenty of time,” which is code for “You’ll change your mind.” It’s okay, though, because you don’t really have to decide anything until you’re about a year out and that is, in fact, plenty of time.
• Ok, breathe break.
• Still breathing.
• One more.
• And continuing. So fine, all of this can be sorted out with time, right? So I was telling my mom that my sister HATED the idea of March or April in Pennsylvania and had vocally and continually made her thoughts on the subject known and said “But you think March or April of 2011 is ok, right, Mom?” and she said “Well, aaaaactually…”
• *this is where I fainted and/or had a stroke, it’s all kind of hazy*
• “Well, aaaaactually… I think you should get married in 2010.” And here’s the thing, Internet – Phil and I actually do want to get married in 2010, but at the time we came up with the initial idea, it wasn’t possible. However, in between that time and the other day, we came up with a savings plan** and, while it will cut a significant portion out of the budget, we are going to be able to swing a 2010 wedding, and we agreed on a date before he went out for the night.
• October, in 2010.
• Every time he called to check in that night, I shrieked incoherently into the phone.
• There goes my “well, you have plenty of time” buffer.
• IT’S GONE.
• However, as of today, I’ve finished asking all of my chosen attendants to participate in my wedding, and they all said yes. Hooray!

Anyway, Internet. That’s what’s been going on with me. I would have told you, you know, if you’d called or something, but this is cool too. Don’t worry.

* There is some debate with regard to the kicking thing, and, Internet, I ask for your judgement. The other day, in the doctor’s office for a follow up on his surgery, Phil did something terrible. I can’t remember what it was, but it must have been just absolutely horrible, because I stood up and tried to kick him on the butt. I was wearing flip flops and don’t do much of anything, aside from shriek, with much force at all, so it is inarguable that Phil would not have been injured if said kick was completed. However, he chose to block my completely harmless kick with his forearm, resulting in a hideous wound in the form of a lumpy bruise to my shin. We are locked in a heated debate as to who is responsible for this wound. He says it is my fault, since I was kicking him. I say its his fault, because my kick would clearly not have harmed anyone, and he is the one who brought harm into the equation.

Phil: YOU kicked ME.
TJ: I did NOT. My kick was incomplete.
Phil: You kicked my arm!
TJ: I did NOT. One, you can’t kick with your shin. Two, you blocked. In WoW, when a warrior blocks, he doesn’t take any damage!
Phil: Well neither does the mob!
TJ: Which only makes my wound ALL THE MORE GRIEVOUS.

** We’re quitting smoking! It’s embarrassing how much money this will save us.

Posted in daily BS, sibling hilarity, Somebody's getting maawwweeed, Yeah, I play WoW | 34 Comments »