Surely you can force down just one more.

PHIL CLEANED UP THE DESK AND I CAN’T FIND THE COSMO I BOUGHT AND THAT’S WHY YOU HAD AN UNFULFILLING CHRISTMAS.

Let’s just do this.

2010
2011, a pretty rough year.

1. What did you do in 2012 that you’d never done before?

I invited the entire Internet over to my house and threw a big weekend long party. I flew across the country with my baby by myself. I went to an aerobics class and also ran out of that aerobics class for reasons I will never, ever discuss (again, because I eventually very briefly discussed it on Twitter).

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

As usual, I didn’t really make any resolutions for 2012, aside from the usual stereotypical vague ideas of starting new and fresh and generally doing better at everything, you know, housework and diet and exercise and marriage and parenting and all of that. Phil went away for three weeks right at the start of the year, so it all went to hell pretty fast.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Not anyone physically close. My cousin had another tiny baby just before Thanksgiving. He’s pretty cute, but I didn’t hold him, because I don’t want to catch baby germ. Also, tons of Internet baby!

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No.

5. What countries did you visit?

Stealing last year’s answer, which I stole from the year before, as I intend to do for the foreseeable future. And by foreseeable future, I basically mean forever. And look, I don’t feel guilty about it. I’m done feeling guilty or ashamed about the fact that I don’t care to travel. I don’t. Not everyone does. There’s nothing wrong with a person who has no desire to travel. There isn’t.

None. You can also retroactively write that down as my year end wrap up answer for every year since 1981, though it isn’t really fair to count 1981, since I was born in December of that year and didn’t even have my birth certificate issued until early 1982, let alone a passport.

6. What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?

We’re looking to move early in 2013. We need more space. MORE SPACE. We need more space. I need space. SPACE. Please. I need space. I need a bathroom for just girls. I need a room for toys. Or at least a room that doesn’t have as many toys as the other rooms. I need to not hear every fart that every creature in this house makes. I need to not be aware of all of the farts.

7. What dates from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

I hate that like 2011, this is hospital related again, but on July 5th, Peno had her kidney surgery, and it went perfectly, way better than expected, even, with how quickly she bounced back and was sprung from the hospital, but when we were waiting in pre-op, and they came to get her, there was this little bit of confusion about when they were taking her, and how far Phil and I were allowed to walk with her, and we had to say this quick and awkward goodbye right outside her pre-op room while she was sitting on this wheeled bed, and then they walked away with the bed, and it was so awkward and sudden that she didn’t even realize that Phil and I weren’t still beside the bed walking along with her, so she didn’t even turn and look, and we just stood there and watched the nurse roll the bed off down the hall and go around the corner, just seeing her sitting there with her back to us, and her tiny curly head not looking back, with no idea when she finally realized we weren’t there with her. UGH. WORST. WORST EVER. WORST THING. Everything went great, it was all perfect, but that was the last thing we saw and I still torture myself all the time wondering when she figured it out. When she was in the OR alone? When a stranger was holding her? When they put the anesthesia mask over her face? GAH. GAH. WORST DAY.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Even though I’m not entirely thrilled with how it came off and plan to do way better, the fact that there’s almost a 100% return rate from 2012 PJs at TJ’s to 2013 PJs at TJ’s tells me that that was a pretty good one.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Keeping this blog up this year was a pretty big failure, and I think that if I make a resolution at all for 2013, working harder at that will probably be it. If you’ve been reading along for the last year, though, you know the issue I’ve been dealing with on that front, the huge fun-sucker-outer. It’s really something I need to move past. When you put someone completely out of your life, it should be just that – complete. They shouldn’t be allowed to continue to suck the fun out of things you enjoy.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Unfortunately, another fun-suck has been some headache-slash-migraine matters I’ve been dealing with. I was hospitalized in April and I’ve been seeing a neurologist since then. I say headache-slash-migraine because it’s seemed to be both – sometimes migraines, and sometimes distinctly separate just very bad headaches. However, in the last couple of months, things have been looking quite bright – no migraines since October, no runs of terrible headaches since a particularly bad stretch in November. The dosage of medication to get to this point has made blogging and even, oddly, Twitter a bit of a struggle, but life in general just that much more pleasant. Fingers crossed.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

For our anniversary, I got Phil a custom caricature of himself drawn as the tenth doctor from Doctor Who. I was quite proud of that!

Phil as the Tenth Doctor

12. Where did most of your money go?

Penny, bills, rent, a trip to Pennsylvania.

13. What did you get really excited about?

My cousin and I dropped our babies off with grandparents and went to see Shawn Klush (link has autoplay music) while I was in Pennsylvania. Even though it left me with a terrible case of Elvis Mope (IT’S A THING) when it was over, I looked forward to it for AGES, and it RULED SO HARD.

14. What song will always remind you of 2012?

Put Down the Duckie, and anything Fresh Beats, probably.

15. Compared to this time last year, are you:

happier or sadder? Around the endish of 2011, I went on prescription medication for postpartum anxiety that was just ridiculous. I mean, ridiculous. Looking back now, I can’t believe I let it get as bad as it was. And the medication turned me right around within a couple of weeks. And this year, I had to go off it because of a conflict with my migraine rescue medication. And… I’m fine. Like, really fine. So, happier? I’m good.
thinner or fatter? Ok, so… this time last year, I was at my pre-pregnancy weight, but a size higher than pre-pregnancy. This year? Hey. Did I tell you guys I lost 27 lbs? I did! I lost 27 lbs! I’m also still a size bigger than pre-pregnancy. So. Whatever. I’m calling it thinner. I lost 27 lbs! 16 of it since starting the most recent round of the Biggest Blogging Loser, which I am joining up again in January.
richer or poorer? The same. Money comes in, goes back out.

16. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Playing with Penny. I don’t know, I play with her, and then I have things to do, and then the day is over, and I think, why didn’t I play more? Why was I so annoyed?

17. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Right when Peno hit this stage she’s in now, which I won’t describe too much because you know it, right, she’s 20 months old and punishment is ineffective and she also has zero impulse control, I just lost my mind SO MUCH. And it just helps no one. We’re just a little way off from when she’ll start understanding, and me yelling just works ME up, and it’s not doing anything for her but putting an impression in her mind of a mean, angry mother. She doesn’t get it yet. She will. SHE WILL. But she doesn’t. She doesn’t get time out, she doesn’t get consequences. I’m not saying my kid doesn’t need discipline or that I can’t discipline her or that I won’t or that it’s pointless. I’m saying that right now, all I can do is just stop her doing what she’s doing, and that losing my mind isn’t teaching her anything and certainly isn’t making anything better for me. And I just wish I’d done less of that before I clued in to the fact that just taking a deep breath and reminding myself that better times are coming down the road after this phase is a more sane way to go.

18. How did you spend Christmas?

Here, with our little family of three, and it was just perfect. Phil and I did our first “set everything up on Christmas eve like Santa came,” Pen woke up in her own house and came out to inspect all her toys, I cooked dinner, we Skyped with family.

19. What was your favorite TV program?

Doctor Who. I watched all of Doctor Who starting with the ninth doctor in 2005 this year, and this was me:

WHY did I wait so long? WHY are YOU waiting so long? Just do it. DAYUM. Just do it. Shit. Shit. Watch the show. WATCH IT.

20. What were your favorite books of the year?

I had a goal of reading 130 books this year, and I failed. As of today, I’ve read 101. Here’s a link to the first batch, and I plan on doing the second batch this week. My favorites, though, were probably The Fault in Our Stars, because, come on, John Green, and The Art of Fielding. See DAYUM man above.

21. What was your favorite music from this year?

I listened to a lot of Pink and Taylor Swift this year. I mixed that in with my standard Alkaline Trio, The Get Up Kids, Reel Big Fish, Dashboard Confessional, and Penny and I had about four million dance parties to Shoulder to the Wheel by Saves the Day.

Do yourself a favor and have a dance party to Shoulder to the Wheel by Saves the Day.

22. What were your favorite films of the year?

I didn’t see any movies in the theater this year. I don’t think I saw any new releases at all… except maybe the Hunger Games. Was that this year? It was good.

23. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

On my actual birthday, Peno and I met up with her cousins in PA for a very ill-fated photo shoot in which none of the actual photos came out.

Then I had Chinese food, and we all sat around and applauded for Penelope while she put a shirt on as pants.

When I got back to Arizona, Phil and I went for our traditional joint birthday celebration dinner, since we don’t really celebrate our birthdays, as they fall right in the middle of anniversary-Thanksgiving-Christmas holiday run up. It did not go well, as right after dinner, I was felled by the violent 24 hours stomach bug that had gotten both Phil and Penny before me. I thought I was going to escape it. I did not. While I was laying in bed, running to the bathroom to lose more food than I realized I’d eaten EVER, Phil ate our delicious slice of joint birthday cake. And he didn’t leave me any. And then? HE WENT TO THE STORE AND BOUGHT A BOX OF FUNFETTI CAKE MIX. SO THAT I COULD MAKE MYSELF SOME REPLACEMENT CAKE.

I was 31.

24. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

I don’t like this question. SKIP.

25. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?

Forever on a quest to attractively house the c-section pooch.

26. What kept you sane?

Routine, Phil, Penelope.

27. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.

Let’s go back to 2010, because if I’ve learned anything in 2012, it’s a relearning of 2010 lesson:

I never learn. Ever.

 

 

12 thoughts on “Surely you can force down just one more.

  1. Christy M

    You inspired me to watch Doctor Who too! I’m only on season 3 since my husband refuses to watch it with me. My sister’s into it too, and has seen much more than I have. But she was SO geeked when I cross-stitched her a TARDIS for Christmas. It was seriously awesome and now I’m thinking of making myself one too.

  2. Sarah Lena

    Related to nothing: what is the context for the DAYUM gif? Because I’ve had sandwiches that were, like, maybe one or two dayums good, but none that ever made me raise my fist in praise to the powers above, so I need to know where to find that sammich.

    TJ Reply:

    Haha, Five Guys! http://youtu.be/zGkHRa64sDY

  3. Melissa

    Ok. Biggest Blogging Loser – I’m going to check that out. I need some motivation this year. And also, I’m going to use our newly acquired Netflix trial to check out this Doctor you speak of.

  4. shin ae

    My face feels like it wants to cry after reading 7 and 17. Man.

    About number 23: I want Phil to get you a replacement cake slice. He gave you the bug and then ate the cake! So wrong.

  5. Life of a Doctor's Wife

    27 pounds! That is awesome! I think, right? Um, not that I had some personal stake in your weight, but you seemed pleased. So pleased I am for you. I’m over thinking this. Forget I said anything.

    I loved this: “I need to not hear every fart that every creature in this house makes. I need to not be aware of all of the farts.”

  6. Ginger

    #7 made me cry, because oh my damn, heartbreaking. I’m wishing you a 2013 that does not end with a hospital related memory on this list.

  7. NBNickleby

    I am not a traveler either. I just don’t get people who want to backpack across Europe, staying in hostels for months, because, no. No, thank you. I’m fine right here in my own country and, for the most part, my own state. If that’s your thing, good for you but traveling is exhausting to me.

    Also, congratulations on the TWENTY! SEVEN! POUNDS! It’s awesome, truly.

    Also, Phil owes you cake. Like, a whole one. Like, a big, fancy one from a big, fancy bakery. Funfetti is fabulous and my very favorite, but it’s the principle of the thing, PHILLIP.

  8. susie

    1) I would say that the cousin pictures DID in fact turn out. That example will be much appreciated one day. “Hands off my pony, or you get a shoe to the head!”

    2) Phil is grounded about that cake, right? Because no. That will not stand.

  9. motheroad

    I think you are the only blogger that I actually READ. I mean, I have a blog, and people comment, and it’s nice, but I never go and read THEIR blogs. I KNOW. I AM A MONSTER. But your blog – well, I just get INTO it. I like the stuff you say. I feel like I’m talking to a friend. (Even though nobody’s actually talking, it’s just me reading your blog to myself in my head. But you know what I mean. I’m IDENTIFYING.)

    Or maybe you don’t know what I mean, and you never read other people’s blogs in their imaginary voices. Lucky, sane you.

    Here’s to a brand-new, clean-slate, fresh-start bloggity New Year.

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