You guys! Do you remember this day last year? When I asked you to guess what day it is, but then I didn’t actually let you guess but told you what day it was because, let’s be honest, “guessing” wasn’t one of your best skills last year?
Well, you guys have really worked hard over the last year, and I admit, your guessing skills have gotten much better, but I have Eggos in the toaster and it’s really important that I eat them AS SOON AS POSSIBLE, so I don’t really have time to wait for your (improved! really! gold star for you!) guessing skills. So once again, I’m just going to tell you what day it is.
Hooray! Delurking Day! The day you are LEGALLY OBLIGATED, by Internet law, to stop just peering through the curtains and actually SAY something. Now, ideally, once the ice was broken by your comment today, you’d be free of your shyness shackles and comment with abandon all over the Internet, but this is not an ideal world so I understand if that doesn’t happen. But I do have to inform you that the law says that you have to comment today.
Last year, I did my own Delurking Day Survey, to make coming out of hiding a little bit easier, so that you didn’t have to feel pressure to come up with anything witty or brilliant all on your own. Plus, since the survey is all about you, it takes care of the problem that some non-commenters site – that every time you go to say something, someone else has already said it.
That’s basically the story of this entire blog, but does that stop me? NO!
Anyway, here is the survey. The whole Internet is demanding you delurk today, Internet, and I’m making it easy on you with a simple survey for you to fill out. Do other blogs treat you this good? No, I bet they don’t. That’s why if you delurk on one blog today, it should be mine. Not that it’s a vote or anything. It’s just that you might only have time to comment on a few, or maybe just one. Would you like a cookie or to borrow my Slanket? How can I make you comfortable? Comment on my blog.
Anyway! Since last year’s survey worked so well, I’ll be using it again. Even if you’re not a lurker, you can fill it out, and even if you filled it out last year, you should fill it out again this year, so we can all sit together on the deck in those obnoxious thick-necked sweaters, drinking beer and wines we’ve chosen not because we like them, but because we think they’ll be impressive to those we’re with, and laugh through big fake smiles about how much we’ve grown, while we run our hands over the carefully pressed front-creases in our jeans!
The TJ Delurker Survey, 2011:
1. What’s your name, and how long have you been reading this site?
2. Do you have a blog and/or a Twitter name and/or something else we should all read today? If you don’t have one yourself, you can tell us about someone else who is deserving of our eyeballs today.
3. What is your favorite song right now? I am going to go listen to it and tell you what I think. No pressure.
4. Is there anything I haven’t covered or answered but I should have, but you couldn’t tell me that because you were busy lurking?
5. Are you a lurker everywhere, or is it just my blog? I’m going to guess everywhere, because it’s not like you’re intimidated by all my medals or anything. THOUGH YOU MIGHT BE! Because I have actually WON SOME MEDALS since the time I wrote the question last year! So, for the first year in the history of my 12+ years of blogging, “INTIMIDATED BY MEDALS” is a valid reason for not commenting!
6. Tell me something really weird or unusual about you. That will take care of the whole “every time I want to say something, someone already said it” thing.
7. Recommend something. A book, or a movie, or a flash game, or a friend of yours as a really excellent person, or a valid career path, or a little known parenting strategy, or a super clever cleaning tip or trick, or incredibly helpful organizational tool, or the best socks you’ve ever owned. This is your moment to SHINE, Internet.
So there you have it! It’s Delurking Day, and while I understand that many people lurk because they have nothing to say, or someone already said it, I have created a SURVEY for you so that you know that you definitely have some things to say that I am interested in hearing. Last year, I spent the entire day attempting to respond to 100+ comments, listening to all the songs, and I think I did a reasonably good job of it. I intend to do the same this year. So old commenter or new commenter or “commented once a long time ago and then never again” commenter or never commenter, come out of your bushes and fill out my survey.
I offered you my SLANKET. You HAVE to.