Internet, you are about to behold.
November 6th, 2009 | by TJ |What I am about to show you is no mere “Hey! Look at this!” kind of item.
No.
What I am about to show you is something that can only be displayed with an over the top arm flourish and a “BEHOLD!”
I cannot TELL YOU how excited I am and privileged I feel to be able to be the one to bring this to you today, Internet, and I’ve been practicing my arm flourish all afternoon.
Since this is the Internet, you are going to have to imagine the arm flourish, but bear with me.
Internet, I am very happy to be able to bring this to you today, and I have indeed preserved the order form in case you feel moved to purchase.
If you thought that Three Wolf Moon was the pinnacle of your wardrobe, think again, Internet.
BEHOLD!
Are you beholding this, Internet? ARE YOU EVEN BEHOLDING THIS?
From the tasteful sales copy, that HARDLY even does this item justice (but you can tell that just by beholding it):
Do you have a soft spot in your heart for wolves? Do you melt when you see a devoted mother wolf snuggling with her pups in fresh snow lit by a silvery arctic moon?
If you do, Internet, you are currently beholding the fleece jacket for you. Also, you are beholding me deeply respecting your communion with the wolves, because if I ever saw a mama wolf snuggling with her pups out on the apparent tundra, I wouldn’t stand around beholding too long. You are a better man than I, Internet. Please, continue to behold.
Available in beautiful “Moonlit Grey,” you too to can express your connection to the Spirit of the Wilderness through fleece.
Note that people will be beholding you from both the front, with a trio of tasteful wolves on the upper left breast, AS WELL AS beholding you from behind, with the gorgeous expanse of wolf panorama across your shoulders.
How about those zipper pulls? Have you beheld those zipper pulls, Internet? When unzipping to experience the cool breeze and feel more at one with nature and your wolven brethren, you will be gripping a finely crafted HOWLING WOLF. You’ll be hard pressed not to bare your chest with an answering howl!
Internet, I can practically behold you opening your wallet from here. For only four easy payments of $24.75, people can be beholding you all over town in this “wearable art.”
I’ll be here, with the Reservation Application (you don’t think they let just ANYONE walk around in one of these babies, do you?) for when you’re done beholding this majesty.
Click to BEHOLD more largely and to appreciate the fine detail and craftsmanship.
By boomer on Nov 6, 2009
DO NOT WANT.
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By Pookii on Nov 6, 2009
First payment… $24.75
Second payment… $24.75
Third and fourth payment combined… $49.50
Understanding… Priceless.
For all else, there’s temerity-jane.com
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By john the diver on Nov 6, 2009
I Prefer
http://www.jinx.com/world_of_warcraft/men/shirts/three_worgen_moon.html?catid=41&cs=2&csd=41&preview=1#bigdesign
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By Doodlebug on Nov 6, 2009
The keychain fob sold me.
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TJ Reply:
November 6th, 2009 at 7:03 pm
You really can’t underestimate the value of detailing.
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By Swistle on Nov 6, 2009
I…I…
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TJ Reply:
November 6th, 2009 at 7:02 pm
I know. I know. It’s the majesty that you’re beholding.
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By Mikey on Nov 6, 2009
Last time i “BEHOLDED” a wolf item was 8 years ago in a LSD* induced stupor and it was a black velvet painting of a wolf and i had a staring contest with it for 3 hours. Sadly the wolf won :s Ahh my misspent youth……
*The lawyers said i have to say “Just say NO to drugs and I neither endorse or recommend the use of illegal substances”
On a side note i would totally buy that if i wasn’t a poor college student.
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By Aunt Becky on Nov 6, 2009
It is only a shame that this does not come in a beautiful denim jacket. Or possibly sprayed on the side of my child-napping van.
Also, I owe you an email.
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By Bernie on Nov 6, 2009
Never. If you had that you would be covering up the 3 wolf moon shirt that is the most awsome of clothing.
Now a Hello Kitty……has me thinking.
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By Ebby on Nov 6, 2009
Four installments of….
Wow. Oh I am indeed blown away. A piece of clothing that looks like it is only worth ONE–maybe two–installments of 24.75….for $100….wow.
I think my soul died a little today, TJ. And it’s all thanks to you, are you proud of yourself?! *Sob*
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By Kelly on Nov 6, 2009
Ah, I most certainly will NOT be showing that to Mr. Aerten (he only comes here when I point out something of special TJ awesomeness). He will want. He will covet. I will be unable to be seen in public with him EVER AGAIN.
I love wolves as much as the next person (as long as the next person isn’t Mr. Aerten), but really… not on my clothing.
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By Dzargul on Nov 6, 2009
They don’t state on the brochure just how many wolves it takes to make one. If the answer is > 3, count me in!
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By Jaffa on Nov 7, 2009
It’s white, and longer than the average cloak or cape.
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By Shin Ae on Nov 7, 2009
I wanted this but my mom already has it.
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By Shelly on Nov 12, 2009
One of my co-workers has the three wolf moon shirt!
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